Be Quiet
by InnocentGuilt
Summary: Riku won't talk and sometimes Sora just talks too much. Somewhere in there is balance, but it's getting hard to find these days. Riku/Sora and several other pairings. AU, they're in high school. Sorry for lack of originality.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So this is the third multi-chapter I've started since the end of Listless. I haven't given up on any of my others it just that my mind is mean to me and I have to write whatever comes to my mind. I'll try to keep up with all the stories as best I can, but don't be surprised if there are a few weeks in between updates. **

**Disclaimer: Well gee, I'd just love to say that I own this wonderful game and all of it's characters, but last time I did that people in black suits stole me and beat me with a whiffle bat (shudders). I'd rather not do that again.**

His dreams had always been confusing, like there was always too much to dream about and never enough time to dream it all.

They were never about his life…at least, not the one he was living now. Being a firm believer in reincarnation, when his dreams developed a repeating pattern about himself in several different scenarios set in the same dream world, he could help but believe that he was remembering a past life. Always in the same dream world, he searched; always searching for his friends, for his life, for his salvation…_ light_, some small insignificant voice whimpered to him sometimes.

He was looking for light, and it always seemed just so perfectly close that he at times he could simply reach out and grab it. However, the light was always just the millimeter too far away. It was always just close enough that he could feel the beginnings of warmth over his fingertips but always, just far enough away that he could take no comfort it. He couldn't touch it; couldn't keep it; couldn't find his friends.

Brief snippets flashed behind his eyelids each more lost than the one before. Cold all around him; darkness seeping in; merciless laughter no matter where he went, always in his head—nobody to go with it, only the sound of laughter. He dreamed about fighting to get out. He wanted away from the cold, out of the darkness, away from the laughter. He wanted the light and all things that came with it, but in his dreams it was all so far away.

…_Always just too far away._

He took a deep breath, and suddenly—thankfully—Riku was no longer asleep. His dreams fled from him, leaving only remnants of cold and a fear that when he opened his eyes the darkness would still be swallowing him. Taking deep breaths, he forced his eyes open, panicking momentarily when he saw nothing before his gaze, so striking in its resemblance to his dreams. Slowly though it cleared and though it was still dark, it was obviously only the dark of night and he found himself staring at the shadowed side of his nightstand.

He took a deep, calming breath, moving to roll onto his side but stopping when he felt how disgustingly slick with sweat he was. Sighing, he kicked off his blankets as he sat up on his mattress, moving to take 

off his t-shirt that stuck to his torso. He threw the offending fabric away from him before throwing himself back down onto the cool sheets with a relieved sigh.

Riku stared up at his ceiling, painted bright yellow—babies cry more in yellow room than in any other color, his mind informed him randomly—and tried to calm himself enough to return to sleep. His heart was beating normally, and his breathing was fine, but his skin seemed to tremor beneath him at the very thought of returning to that land…that time.

It was so dark there, so cold. The very idea of returning sent a shiver down his spine even though the heat in his room was stifling. He rolled over to face his wall, staring at the shade of blue that coated that wall. He had a different shade of blue on the parallel wall, and his other two walls were different shades of green. It was a very colorful room—it's almost like stepping into Rainbow Bright's room, his mind deadpanned. He liked it that way though, because after his eyes adjusted to the dark, the colors would practically glow in the dark, thus he would realize he wasn't still in his dreams when he woke at the odd hours of the morning.

He switched to his other side, groaning as the heat from his skin soaked into sheets, making his bed so uncomfortable he almost couldn't stand it. In fact, he couldn't stand it, so he sat up in bed, rubbing his face to get the feeling of moisture off of him. He rubbed his hands on his pajama bottoms, feeling disgusting as if he were bathing in his own sweat. He carefully extracted himself from his bed, finding his shirt off the ground and yanking it back over his head.

He moved over to his door, peaking his head out into the hallway, his heart beating rapidly as cold darkness flooded his eyesight. Taking calming breaths he waited for it to recede—it always does, his mind told itself more than him. When finally he could see the vague outline of the furniture that decorated the hall, he rolled his eyes at his irrational fear of the darkness. He almost felt like a five-year-old, afraid to go to sleep because there was something under his bed, but he was seventeen, just barely, but still…

It wasn't even that he was afraid of the monster under the bed. The darkness, complete darkness—blind darkness, his mind supplied helpfully—scared him senseless, had for the better part of his life. He had always been plagued by these dreams—more like nightmares, his mind snarled irritably as he headed towards the backdoor. Even as a child, since he was eight at the very least, he would sleep to find the cold darkness and the evil cackling in his mind as he, in his dream, fought battle after battle against creatures that danced to disturbing music in their head, the yellow eyes glowing angrily at him as if he were the cause of them and whatever unhappiness they had known.

Riku moved his silver bangs out of his eyes as he slid, as quietly as he could, out the backdoor. He breathed as the night air hit him, still unbearably hot, but there was a slight breeze which made it so much better than being inside.

Riku took a deep breath, moving to sit in a lawn chair. Arranging himself as comfortably as he could on the flimsy chair, he tilted his head back, staring up at the stars that brought him so much comfort on these endless, sleepless nights.

He thought about nothing, doing his best to blot out the images of his dreams that haunted him. He did that a lot, throwing himself into anything he did just to escape the overwhelming feeling that he was close to following his previous life, or perhaps that his previous life was close to swallowing him. He was halfway positive that was the only reason he had the grades he had maintained all throughout his school career. He didn't feel exceptionally smart, but he needed to escape the feeling that the darkness was closing in on him; that he would wake up and the cold would not abate him, the laughter would not stay in his dreams.

The tension in him refused to leave. His muscles were coiling so tightly he felt the slightest touch would break him, sending him spiraling to a place he'd rather not think of. It nearly startled him out of his skin when he heard the door open behind him. He controlled himself from jumping, looking around the flimsy sides of his lawn chair, to see his uncle standing in the doorway.

Riku could tell he had been asleep, if only by the way his eyes were squinted against the light of the moon and stars and the streetlights that illuminated everything. Other than that, the man looked like he had simply been in his room, waiting to follow Riku and coerce him to return to bed. His hair wasn't mussed. His skin didn't have any indentations from the pillows or mattress. Everything about him was still as perfect as it had been when Riku had retired for the night.

After his brief assessment of his uncle, Riku cast his eyes down to the ground, feeling just the slightest bit of guilt, as if it were his fault that the dreams wouldn't leave him alone.

His uncle, Sephiroth, his mind reminded him, didn't sigh, or get angry—he never really does, his mind chided softly, not at you—he simply spoke, "You have school in the morning, Riku. It is imperative that you at least try to return to sleep."

Riku looked up into the other man's eyes, still feeling as if a stranger were in front of him, though he had spent the last two months in the same house with the man. It still surprised him, how…understanding, for lack of a better word, this man could be. Part of him still expected to find his father staring at him with cold amber eyes, but every time he had looked up these past few months he found sea-green eyes regarding him coolly.

He nodded a short tilt of his head before he stood from the seat, a small task in and of itself as the thing tried to eat him, but he finally made it. Padding across the grass, he looked up at the stars on last time, trying to rob them of whatever comfort they might be able to give him. He sighed, knowing the moment he was inside, where the half-darkness awaited him, whatever comfort he had with the stars would vanish.

Riku swept by his uncle, pausing briefly to glance up into his eyes one last time, as if reassuring himself that it wasn't his father for the millionth time since he had been moved here. Sea-green eyes still stared down at him, regarding him with a clinical curiosity. Knowing that, Riku slid all the way passed him, not turning around to see his uncle shut the door.

"Good night, Riku," Sephiroth said in that strong voice that seemed to run through their family. Riku simple nodded and waved his hand over his head.

He returned to his room and sat on his bed, turning the television in his room on and putting it on mute. He knew he wouldn't sleep again tonight. He was too afraid of the darkness that was on the other side of his mind, crouching, waiting to pounce on him, drag him under. He wouldn't sleep until he was just too exhausted to stay awake, which wouldn't happen until tomorrow night, and even then, he may force himself to stay up just a little longer.

KH

Sora woke none too gently from the sweet depths of sleep by the feeling that he was plummeting. His big, blue eyes snapped open and his entire body tensed. He was still on his bed though, the morning light creeping through the window and shining rudely in his eyes. He grumbled and pulled his blanket over his head, his brown spikes disappearing into the cocoon of delicious warmth. He smiled gently to himself, still in the throws of sleep, when suddenly the feeling came again, followed by the feeling of being smothered.

He yanked his blanket down and glared, meeting the quite familiar face of his twin, who was staring down at him with one of his blonde eyebrows quirked. Sora studied him for a moment, taking in all of his twin before throwing his head back onto his pillow and groaning, "Roxas…what do you_ want?"_

Roxas huffed, shaking Sora violently in his bed. "I want, as I've only been yelling at your comatose form for ten minutes now, for you to get up! School is starting today!" he grumbled, getting off of Sora's bed and yanking his blankets away viciously.

Sora protested immediately, shooting up in his bed to grasp after the bedspread that was being hauled into the middle of the floor and dropped carelessly. Roxas crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at Sora and demanding him, "Come get 'em."

Sora pouted at his twin for only a moment before he threw himself back into his bed. "I can sleep without blankets," he said petulantly. He bit his lip to keep from grinning when he heard Roxas sigh.

Footsteps were heard as his brother's sneakers stomped on their wooden flooring. The door opened, the brunette heard, but there was a pause before the inevitable slamming. He opened his eyes lazily to see Roxas regarding him with a cruel twist of his lips, saying when he was aware that he had Sora's attention, "If you're not up in ten minutes, I'm sure Leon would be only too happy to come and awaken you."

Sora shot up and out of his bed, hurling himself towards the door while yelling, "Roxas! Don't you dare!" Their door slammed shut just before Sora reached it and he ended up smacking into it with his entire body. Just on the other side Sora heard his twin laughing at him, causing him to groan and lean his head again the cool wood.

He huffed, "Well, since I'm up and all…"

He went to his dresser and pulled out some clothing, not paying any attention to what he pulled out, knowing it would somehow match by the end of the day. Then he went to bathroom, which he usually used the last since he loved sleep so much, and turned on the water, readying to take a quick shower before breakfast.

He stepped out shortly after he had jumped in and shook his hair free from as much water as possible as he dried himself off and dressed. By the time he ambled into the small kitchen, his bad mood at having to be awake had vanished; always chipper after that first ten minutes of being awake. He smiled brightly at everyone in the kitchen, saying in his almost painfully chipper voice, "Morning, everyone!"

Leon and Roxas both grumbled in return; their morning grouchiness had a tendency to stay until they retired for bed. Aerith, however, smiled at him and handed him a bowl of oatmeal, returning his greeting with a kind, "Good morning, sunshine."

He took his bowl gladly from her and went to sit over at the table, swinging his legs excitedly at the prospect of being back in school and seeing all of his friends that he hadn't seen over the summer. He had been excited to return to school—even if he hadn't been excited about having to wake up early—ever since he had received his schedule, locker number and combination. He had always been happy at the idea of something new, even simple things like a new grade, a new locker, a new combination. It made him giddy.

He looked over at his twin, who had never seemed to be excited over anything, and asked jubilantly, "Are you happy to be going back to school, Roxy?"

Roxas glared at him, daring him silently to use that nickname on him again, not that Sora noticed. He was much too happy about seeing his friends again. Roxas however… "Oh, I'm just thrilled about having school, homework,_ and_ work. Oh, boy, I just can't even express it," he said blandly, kicking away from his place at the table to put his bowl in the sink.

Sora rolled his eyes as he finished his breakfast, following his blonde twin's movements in taking his own bowl to the sink. Once he set it down, he whirled around on his heel, looking for his twin only to catch on black and red sneaker as it exited the kitchen. He looked at Aerith, who had been watching after Roxas with a small frown.

"What his problem?" Sora asked.

She shrugged, shaking her head a little. "I don't know," she said quietly, looking down at her watch. "I've got to go, though. Will one of you do the dishes when you get home?" She looked up at him again, expectantly, smiling gently when he nodded at her. "Thank you," she looked over to the only person left at the table, "Leon, when will you be home?"

"Dunno," he mumbled. "Whenever I get off."

Aerith nodded slowly. "Okay. Well, call if you're going to be too late."

Leon nodded distractedly, calling out a quiet goodbye as Aerith left the room. Sora was left with his older brother, who at best was withdrawn, at worse was just downright anti-social. Sora couldn't imagine that he would appreciate any small talk that Sora could drum up, so he left the room, pausing momentarily to brush his hand across his older brother's shoulder.

"I'll see you later, Leon," he said quietly as he moved past him.

He was a little shocked to hear the man call after him, "Have a good day at school."

He almost backtracked to look back into the kitchen, perhaps to ask if he had been hearing things, but he decided against it. It wouldn't do to press his luck, so real or not, Sora let it go and continued on his way upstairs to the room he and Roxas shared.

**A/N: I don't know what do say down here. The standard please review, while standing on my knees and begging comes to mind, but I do that every story, and I'm sure you all have the gist of it. Anywho…yeah that's it! I love all of my readers and reviewers.**

**InnocentGuilt**


	2. Chapter 2

Roxas and Sora walked up the steps to the main building of the high school, Sora practically buzzing with excitement while Roxas stared blandly ahead of him. They had been like this the entire walk from their house. Sora had chattered non-stop while his twin had nodded at his side, throwing in a comment every now and then to prove that he was listening, even if he didn't want to. Sora would have huffed at Roxas' quiet demeanor, but his twin was often like that, and when he was talkative it was usually to cut someone down to feel like a bug on the underside of his sneaker.

Sora bounced up to the doors, walking in and holding it open for his grumbling brother. The two of them hadn't taken two steps inside before they heard their names being called by a delicate voice at the other end of the hall, "Roxas! Sora! Over here!"

They looked around for the very familiar voice of Namine. They found her waving at them from beside her own twin by their lockers. Roxas waved back at her, signaling that he had seen her and they made their way over to the petite blonde girl.

"Hey, Namine," both boys said in almost perfect unison. She smiled and put her arms around Roxas in a brief hug, before pulling Sora into an embrace. Behind them they heard metal slamming against metal, and looked over to see Kairi slamming her lock into her locker two more times before trying her combination again.

"Hey, Kairi," Sora said with an amused grin on his face.

She whipped her head around, her cinnamon brown hair flying around her face. She smiled at him, and said, "Hey! I'll hug you in a moment. My lock is currently being stubborn."

She turned back around to twist her dial again, Namine and Roxas both going over to hover around her. Sora stood back looking around the hallway for more people to converse with. He didn't see anyone right off the bat, and when he looked over to his brother and friends again he found that they had rotated around, and now Roxas was giving her combination a try.

"I'm gonna go put my bag in my locker; see how stubborn my lock is," he told them, already heading away from his friends. Kairi looked over at him nodding briefly and he heard Roxas mumble a quiet, 'whatever.'

He turned around and headed off towards his locker, knowing his number and combination by heart ever since he had received the paper from his homeroom teacher. He stepped up to his locker entering the combination into his lock and sighing in relief when it opened without any troubles. He stuffed his bag in, taking out a notebook and a pen then shutting his locker. On the other side of his shut locker door was another kid.

He was new to this school, Sora knew because he had never seen another person in his high school with silver hair. His bag was stuffed full of different things, unlike most of the other kids who didn't care enough to buy anything until after the first weekend back to school, hoping that the teachers would be kind and save homework until the Monday following the first day back to school. On top of that all, he 

glanced around the school apprehensively, his muscles coiled tightly as if someone were going to jump out and laugh at him for being new here.

He yanked on the lock a little, before re-entering the numbers. Sora rolled his eyes at the cheap locks that the school was too stubborn to replace. Taking a step closer to the new boy, he put a smile on.

"Hi! You must be new here," he said, kindly, his smile growing when the silver haired teen nodded slightly, slightly twisting the dial to his lock with precise turns. He didn't say anything else, just moved the dial, yanking on the lock every so often to see if the combination had worked. Sora watched for a few moments, then said, "Here let me try."

The new kid looked him over doubtfully before stepping away, watching as the brunette stepped over to his locker. "Some of these locks are older than I am," Sora said before he slammed the lock against the locker. "You've got to be rough with them, and if you go three ticks past the first number, they're more likely to open on the first try. What's you're locker combination?"

Fingers wrapped around his wrist pulling his hand up and slipping a piece of paper into his palm. Sora took the paper and looked at the numbers that were written neatly on the top of the page. He spun the dial three times clockwise, pushing it three numbers past what was written on the paper, the backwards and clockwise again. He yanked the lock down happy when it came free.

"There you go," he said, looking at the paper once more to catch his name. "Riku, eh? I'm Sora. Hey, you and my brother have a lot of your classes together. His name is Roxas, you won't be able to miss him; he looks just like me, only with blonde hair." He smiled; handing Riku back his schedule after his curiosity had been satisfied. "I'll see ya later," he said jubilantly beginning to walk away with his notebook and pen held tightly in his hand. He stopped when a hand fell on his shoulder, turning around to face Riku again, "Yeah?"

Riku put his schedule into Sora's hand, pointing at his first hour class.

"Oh, that classroom is in building three," he looked up to see Riku's face filled with curiosity. Sora pointed down the hallway to the double doors. "Go out those doors right there and take a left. It's the building with the flag pole in front of it." Riku nodded and took his schedule back from him, giving a small salute before he headed off.

Sora smiled contentedly to himself, glad to have been some help to someone. He turned and walked back to his friends seeing Namine and Roxas leaning next to Kairi's locker. Roxas was smiling a thin smile at something the petite girl was telling him. They didn't notice him as he walked up, or at least he thought they hadn't noticed him. As soon as he still, Roxas looked up at him and offered him a small smile, more real that the one he had been giving Namine.

Sora smiled brightly back at him and asked, "Where'd Kairi go?"

Namine spun around, her eyes wide with shock, obviously not having noticed his presence at all until he had said something. She pressed her small hand over her heart and shook her head at her jumpiness. 

"Sora…" she breathed, as if reassuring her mind that it hadn't been a voice from above or something silly like that. "Kairi went to get a new lock, because hers isn't opening."

Sora looked at his twin, "You, superman of lockers, could not get a lock to open?"

Roxas rolled his eyes. "It happens more often than you think, fluff for brains."

Sora grinned, not bothering to take the insult to heart because that was just how his brother was. He looked around for Kairi to return and in the process caught a glance at the clock at the end of the hall. Five minutes 'til first hour and his classroom was across the school grounds. He adjusted his pen and notebook, saying, "Hey, I'm gonna head to my first class," already walking away from them.

"See you at lunch, Sora?" Roxas asked as his twin began walking away.

Sora turned around, walking backwards without a care in the world. Grinning, he said, "Duh!"

KH

Sora walked into the lunch hall, his stomach growling loudly at him in protest. He had been hungry ever since the end of first hour; he felt like he hadn't eaten in years, instead of only a few hours. He hopped over into the line, thankful that it was shorter than it normally was due to his class beforehand being practically three light-years away.

Grabbing a tray, he spun around to face the millions of tables that littered the hall, looking for his blonde doppelganger. As if knowing he was being searched for, Roxas stood and waved one hand around lazily for him. Sora smiled and signaling that he had seen as he moved forward in the line to where the large buffet of food was. He threw a sandwich on his tray, ham not turkey, knowing how desperately starving he was when he school's slop looked absolutely delicious. He moved down the place, picking at what he wanted to eat, and what he wouldn't feed to his worst enemy, not that he had any.

He was reaching for a bag of chips when he saw someone's wrist reach for what the school had tried to pass off as several different things in the past. He looked up, completely shocked that someone was brave enough to eat that, or perhaps to ask if the poor fool had lost a bet, but he saw the new kid, Riku looking at it cautiously as if it were going to eat him instead of the other way around.

"You don't want to eat that," he said quickly. Riku looked up at him, raising an eyebrow in question. Sora smiled, "We did an experiment on that in my freshman year. We've determined it's where the plague found its origin." Riku smirked, putting the spoon down in the bowl and picking up a scoop in some yellow stuff, he looked at Sora in askance. "That's all right. It's banana pudding," he said, picking up a spoonful of corn. He looked over at Riku's tray to see had a sandwich and asked, "What kind of sandwich did you get?"

Riku pulled the bread off the top of his sandwich to reveal ham. "Okay," Sora breathed a sigh of relief. When Riku looked up at him curiously, he explained, "A lot of my friends think the turkey in this school is the leading cause of salmonella."

Riku wrinkled his nose in disgust. The brunette just nodded, seeming to pick up on his thoughts without him having to voice anything. "Yeah, this school has had so many health department investigations…somehow they always manage to pass," Sora said, shaking his head ruefully. "It's a shame and I wouldn't eat here if I could get away with it, but it's better than what I can drum up at home, you know?"

Riku nodded as he reached the end of the buffet. Sora watched as he looked around the room aimlessly, obviously finding nowhere that he felt comfortable enough to sit. When he had piled that last of what he wanted onto his tray he went over to Riku's side, pointing out the table where his twin and their twin friends sat, asking kindly, "You wanna sit with me and my friends?" Riku looked hesitant. "No, it's okay. They're all really nice." Slowly, Riku nodded and followed him to the table his friends had already seated themselves at.

"Hey everyone, this is Riku," he said as he took his seat next to his twin. He smiled back at the silver-haired teen, scooting over so he could take a seat.

"We've met," Namine said with a quiet smile on her face, Roxas nodding along with what she said, his mouth twisted in disgust as he stared at his fork with betrayal lighting his eyes.

Riku nodded at them and took a seat next to Sora. Kairi, who was sitting across from him said, "Riku, huh?" She smiled. "He's awfully cute."

Riku looked at her blankly and Namine, being the one sitting on the other side of Riku, smiled. "She says that about everyone," she said soothingly, noticing the subtle line of tension that had stiffened Riku's shoulders.

Riku nodded slowly and turned his attention to his tray, playing with something he had poured into one of the compartments before Sora had turned up to guide him through the buffet. Sora glanced at him every so often, between eating stuffing his face and quieting his starving stomach. Roxas struck up a conversation with Kairi about the trigonometry class they obviously shared. Sora didn't bother paying attention. Math was Roxas' strong suit, where he would take any English class, any day. So he continued to watch Riku, noticing vaguely that Namine had taken the same interest in him, because he didn't seem to be eating anything.

Sora gave a shy smile, "I guess I shouldn't have told you the horror stories of our lunch room before you ate, huh?"

Before Riku could do anything, Sora heard his twin, who looking at him disappointed, ask, "You told him about the plague, didn't you?"

Sora grasped for words, blushing a little at not having thought about the cause his words would have on Riku. "He was reaching for it! I didn't want him to die!" he finally screeched, indignantly.

Roxas rolled his eyes and looked turned his attention to Riku, saying in as comforting a voice he could pull of without hurting himself, "Not all of the school's food is deadly. Just stick by what the person next 

to you gets and you'll be safe. Most of us have had three years to sort through this slop and decide what's edible and what the cooks are trying to poison us with."

Kairi picked up nearly instantly where Roxas left off, tacking on a quick, "The banana pudding is actually really good today."

He granted them a grateful nod and took a small bite of the pudding, seeming thoughtful for a moment before taking another bite. The crowd, content that Riku wasn't scarred away from eating the cafeteria food—though it would probably be better for his health—turned their attention away from him, mostly. Sora still watched Riku eat, feeling a little guilty for having put Riku through that. However, he wasn't so engrossed in the new boy that he didn't instigate conversation.

"Kairi, did you get a new lock for you locker?" he asked.

Kairi rolled her eyes, frustration falling over her pretty features as she huffed, "Oh, they're going to see if they can fix my lock instead of giving me a new one…which means, they aren't going to do a damn thing and I'm probably going to have to share a locker with Namine for the rest of the year."

From the corner of his eye, Sora saw Namine tilt her head to the side, her face coming over with a subtle hint of hurt as she asked her own twin, "What's so wrong with that?"

Kairi looked over at her, before she sighed longsuffering. "Nothing, Namine! I didn't mean anything by it!"

The hurt left instantly and she smiled as slyly as a girl like Namine could smile, saying, "I'm glad to hear that."

They traded conversation in between eating, Riku never once offering any conversation, but watching them as he sniffed his food cautiously before taking a bite. Nobody seemed to notice, but when finally the bell rang, and the gang of friends had dispersed into the crowd, Roxas came up beside his twin, putting his arm lazily around the other's shoulders.

"He's kinda quiet," Roxas observed as Riku walked a few yards ahead of him, only distinguishable by the unusual color hair he sported.

The brunette opened his mouth to say something, but stopped. He hadn't really noticed, but Riku hadn't said a word, not once in the short time Sora had spoken to him. His mind buzzed curiously at that, wondering why. The most logical answer would be that he was shy, but he didn't really look shy, cautious perhaps, but not shy. Maybe Riku wasn't really interested in talking to them?

Sora's face wrinkled, at that thought, feeling hurt for some unknown reason that someone, especially Riku—who he really didn't know that well—wouldn't be interested in talking to them.

He was shaken a little by Roxas. When he looked over he saw his twin studying the people around him, looking like he hadn't just shaken Sora or that there was no reason behind it. However after a moment 

of Sora looking at him with a look on his face that clearly said, 'What?' the blonde said a bit distantly, "Don't worry over it too much. It was just an observation."

KH

Riku felt like he was being kept awake only by the grace of the never ending noise around him. As he had predicted, he hadn't slept at all last night after he had woken from his dream, and his uncle had been right. It probably would have been better for him to go back to sleep, even with the prospect of the darkness swallowing him. He felt like he was going to fall over at any second as he walked towards his locker at the end of the school day.

It wouldn't have been so bad had it not been the first day, and the teachers hadn't droned on and on about their syllabuses which were all exactly alike despite the class differences. The only thing, absolutely only thing, which had helped the monotony, was the spiky-haired brunette who had chattered at him endlessly for the brief intervals they had seen each other.

He had actually been quite surprised when Sora—if you rearrange the letters in his name they spell 'soar;' isn't that interesting? His mind prattled uselessly—had continued to speak to him after helping him open his lock. He had been even more surprised that the brunette seemed to know what he was asking without any troubles at all. He hadn't met anyone like that, not that he had met many people since he had lost the ability to speak, but still… he had imagined it would be hard to find anyone to communicate with. Naturally being used to being alone, it hadn't bothered him too much, but having someone to keep him company was always nice, and he had hoped, if only just a little.

Sora had just held conversations with him as if Riku had actually been speaking back; he thought thankfully as he reached his locker, slamming his lock against the metal door before entering the combination the way Sora had taught him. He breathed a small sigh of relief when the lock pulled free for him.

He noticed Sora walk up to his locker, watching him mildly as he pushed his book for his last period class into his now full locker. The boys twin, Roxas came up to the locker directly next to his, casting him a distant glance before shoving Sora a little and nodding towards Riku. Riku looked away, pulling his backpack out and slinging it over his shoulder lazily.

When he shut the door, he was only mildly shocked to see Sora on the other side. They stared at each other for a moment. Sora seemed to be nervous about something, kneading his lower lip between his teeth, and having his hands stuffed deep into his jean pockets. Riku noticed in a distant part of his mind that his blonde twin had traveled until he was somewhere behind them, leaving the two of them in some semblance of privacy.

The brunette seemed to gather up the courage he needed to get him through this situation, which would more than likely prove to be awkward the way it had already shaped up, "So, uh, we were just noticing that you're, um, not too…talkative?" he said, lifting a hand to rub the back of his neck while ducking his head.

Well, at least he doesn't dance around the subject, his mind commented dryly. Riku tried to find a way to tell the brunette that it wasn't that he didn't want to talk, which really he didn't. He hadn't liked talking even when he could, but that wasn't the point. He actually would like to be able to tell people he didn't want to talk to them instead of have them think he was being poor-mannered.

Before he could do anything, the lithe brunette looked up at him through his lashes, asking, "Do you not want to talk to us or something…because if we came on to strong we, uh…we didn't mean to."

Riku waved his hands, impatiently, trying to get his attention before the brunette could get carried away—you realize you must look like a chicken taking off for flight, his mind asked bitterly. He felt a scowl coming on from his mind's dialogue, but he forced it back, well aware that by now he had Sora's attention and he needed to do something to get the fact the he couldn't talk across.

He put his hand up to his throat, shaking his head a little—charades! I bet he's just fucking great at this game, his mind continued sardonically. Much to his delight, Sora apparently was. After watching Riku for a moment, and having a brief second to think it over, it dawned on him, "You can't talk!"

Riku nodded, sorrowful now that he thought about his limitation. He stared at the brunette for a moment, before looking at the floor and shouldering his backpack further onto his shoulder. For a moment it almost looked as if his shorter counterpart wanted to ask why, which would have been oh, so wonderfully complicated. A.) he didn't want to talk about it. B.) even if he did, he had no way to.

When he looked over Riku's shoulder distractedly, the silver-haired teen felt a wave of anxiety take him—that's just_ so_ unusual, isn't it? He could practically feel his mind rolling its eyes. The idea that perhaps with this complication, Sora, or any of the brunette's friends, wouldn't want to be associated with him any longer. He didn't know why, but that was disappointing, even if it had been what he was expecting. He tried not to show any distress at the prospect of being along with only his very vocal mind and the darkness in his dreams for the rest of his life, more to the point without Sora, whom he had taken a strange liking to in the very,_ very_ brief time the brunette had spoken to him.

Suddenly, Sora looked back to him and said in a relieved voice, "Well, here I thought I had been boring you half to death." He gave a shy chuckle, shaking his head as if it was his fault he had thought that. "That's a load off my mind."

Roxas brushed past them, calling over his shoulder, "I'm going home with or without you, Sora."

The brunette's huge blue eyes became even impossibly huge as he started after his twin.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Riku," Sora called while swinging around to walk backwards as he and his twin walked away. Roxas looked back briefly, waving a little. Riku waved back at them and Sora smiled, turning around just in time to push through the double doors.

KH

"How did you enjoy your first day of school?" Sephiroth asked him, his tone as emotionless as always as they sat at the small dinner table in the dining room.

Riku shrugged, staring down into his plate of Chinese food, which his uncle had picked up before he had returned home. It wasn't bad, but for some reason, with his conflicting feelings of needing to sleep and fearing the cold darkness that haunted his dreams, he just didn't feel like eating. He had forced down a few bites, but now all he could seem to do was push his food into mounds and then mash them down—you are now playing god to a plate of food, his mind practically sneered at him, creating the mountains and destroying the mountains as you please.

He snorted at his minds dry commentary, before realizing that he wasn't the only one in the room. Looking up, he saw his uncle looking at him cautiously. He grimaced, giving a little shrug in dismissal before continuing on his warped power trip.

Sephiroth cleared his throat in a manner that said he was actually clearing his mind of Riku's oddness. "Did you make any…friends?" he asked, the word sounding foreign on his tongue.

Riku thought about Sora, and his batch of friends, but didn't know if he would go as far as to call them his own friends yet. Although, Sora hadn't seemed at a loss as to what to do with him when he had discovered that Riku couldn't talk. Maybe he wouldn't run off at all if he hadn't ran immediately, and if Sora didn't run off, perhaps that meant the others wouldn't leave either. He knew that was wishful thinking, so he shrugged again, pushing his broccoli and beef around on his plate.

"Well, did anyone associate with you?" Sephiroth tried again, always striking up whatever little conversation Riku was possible of at the dinner table. Riku thought it was nice—almost like people talking to their pets, his mind added helpfully, not at all—he didn't like being ignored and with his deficiency, it was rather easy to ignore him.

Riku looked up into his uncle's sea-green eyes and nodded a small smile ghosting over his face. Sephiroth inclined his head, "Very well." He looked at the plate in front of Riku, now sporting several mounds of food. He sighed, and Riku ducked his head, feeling a little bit of embarrassment for playing with food like a wayward child. "Eat your food, Riku," his uncle demanded, "don't play with it."

Riku nodded, stabbing at his beef and broccoli. They continued in silence for a few moments, until Sephiroth had finished with his plate, contenting himself to watch Riku struggle down more food. When that apparently was too much from him, he struck up another conversation.

"Will you require anything for your classes, Riku?" It was a simple question, but in its own way, it was permission to discontinue eating if he wasn't hungry. Sephiroth almost never brought anything up that would require Riku to leave the table unless the teen was finished eating. He mostly stuck to yes or no questions.

Riku went to his bag, which he had leaned against the wall just inside the door, and pulled out a sheet of paper, looking it over briefly before handing it to Sephiroth. His uncle peered at it critically. For a second, Riku was taken back, and honestly believed his face would twist with disgust at how 'expensive' all of his 

schooling needs were. In that second, he felt small waves of panic taking over him and he fully expected the eyes that looked up at him to be a very angry shade of amber.

As if sensing his anxiety of the color of his eyes, Sephiroth looked up, showing Riku very clearly that his eyes weren't amber, but, in fact, the same sea-green eyes he had been staring into for the past two and a half months. "Very well," his uncle said, calmly, not angry at all. "I shall retrieve these this weekend. Would you like to accompany me into town? You might like to pick out a cell phone."

His nerves settling, Riku found himself looking at the older man quizzically, wondering what the hell he would do with a cell phone—that's like giving a deaf person headphones, his mind rattled off sarcastically. It was almost cruel to think about a cell phone, any phone at all. Sephiroth didn't have a home phone, only his own cell phone and a pager for when the hospital called, needing him to come in to perform one operation or another. The idea of having something to mock that fact that he couldn't speak…it made his heart constrict a little in pain.

"Though your voice may not be working for you at the moment," Sephiroth began explaining, "I'm sure your fingers are quite capable of pressing buttons. I don't need to hear your voice to know that you make it home fine. Just page me when you get home and I will know that you've made it." Riku nodded, hesitantly, knowing that his uncle wasn't quite finished by the way he was looking him over silently. "Besides," he continued, just as Riku thought he would. "I've seen children doing texting…I believe the heathens call it? I'm sure any friends you drum up would be glad to talk to you in some form or another."

Riku smiled, for a moment feeling the fear of amber eyes and cold, blind darkness being chased away by being able to connect to other people again, without teleplay everything he wanted to say.

Oh, but charades is so much fun, his mind said with faux-enthusiasm—not even that upset him.

**A/N: Oh…I find this story so much easier to write than**_** Better Days**_**. That story mentions a lot of Freecell—like the computer game—and I love that game, so every time I bring it up I have to play like three millions games. I either have to make it to where Axel's playing a different game or it's going to take quite a while between updates for that story, lol. **

**Anywho, focusing on this story, because it's obviously the one you're reading, I think Riku is OOC. It's really killing me. I know it's hard to write him in character if he can't talk and be all snarky, but I'd really like to be able to capture him. I think Sora's also a little out of character, but it seems I can't make anyone that naïve. I know it's possible for someone to be that naïve…but I just can't write it. However, Riku I like to think I can write, so if you have any suggestions…I would love you from now until the end of time.**

**I've also realized going over the last chapter and this one that Riku seems just a little bit…crazy? I mean he would be after what you will find out I put him through, but I'm not sure I want him to be crazy crazy, but out-of-it crazy. I hope that makes sense to you because I don't know a better way to put it. **

**Anyway, please review and tell me what you think. To anyone who's reading**_** Better Days**_** I will try and post for it soon, but the GAME…it calls to me.**

**InnocentGuilt **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Dunkelmur asked me who the uke was in this fic, and I have to be completely honest. I have absolutely no clue as of this very second. I'm thinking it might be Riku, because that's just what it's turning out to look like. But…yeah…**

**I have to give the biggest thanks to StupifiedNarutard, because you left me the longest, most wonderful review for my last chapter, and I hope you enjoy this chapter as well.**

The weekend came fast for Riku, yet at the same time took forever. Between not being able to get more than three hours of sleep a night and adjusting to his new school, he felt exhausted, haggard even. Often he found himself in the gauzy haze of almost sleep as he worked on his homework before dinner, snapping himself out of it when he heard the whispers of a disembodied laughter, sensed darkness closing in, felt the cold lapping at his skin.

The only thing that helped relieve his exhaustion was Sora and his astounding ability to understand anything Riku tried to get across to him. It was almost like a natural connection between them. Sora would watch him carefully, and instantaneously he would get what Riku was teleprompting. It was almost to the point where they could hold entire conversations together, though Sora did most the talking.

Riku was beginning to believe that perhaps being in a strange new town, with a strange new home and school was worth it. He didn't like what had happened to get him there, but he was indeed glad to be there. In a very short three days, he felt as if he and Sora had known each other all their lives. He wasn't even surprised to feel anxiety over seeing the brunette—that wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that he's 5'7" of pure adorableness, would it? His mind asked him curiously.

It did have something to do with that if Riku was honest with himself, but every time he even vaguely thought about having any sort of attraction to the kind brunette, an unsavory taste would fill his mouth and his stomach would start rolling—if you could dwell in the past anymore, you'd have no use for photographs, him mind commented dryly. He didn't care what his mind said. He was justified in the reaction to him liking another male.

He had sworn to himself those short two months ago that he would quash any of those sorts of tendencies, not wishing to suffer the same consequences as the first time. He had gambled with his sexuality, and he had paid a high price; his ability to speak. He wasn't foolish enough to try that again. Even if he tried to keep it a secret, his secrets were never his own for long. It was best just to terminate any sort of romantic feelings he had for Sora.

Too bad, his mind said morosely, there's no one better for you.

He rolled his eyes at his unhelpful internal dialogue. He really didn't need it trying to pull him in a different direction than he wanted to go. Already he was conjuring up images in his head; images of being happy, and not having to worry about whether his ability to speak was a problem or not, images of just being with Sora. He just didn't need this torture.

He huffed, blowing his silver bangs out of his eyes so he could better watch the muted people moving across his television screen. Perhaps if he engrossed himself in the way their lips moved, he could escape the cruelty of his mind. He would have all weekend to dwell in the cruelty of his awkward feelings; all weekend to squish them like a bug beneath his shoe. When he returned to school, he wouldn't have any of these feelings. He would bottle them up and send them away on the proverbial sea. He just had to concentrate.

A light knocking at his door, painted yellow to match his ceiling, startled him out of his reverie. He looked over to the door as it opened slowly, revealing on the other side, his uncle dressed casually and looking over Riku's form on the bed. Riku had been up since three in the morning, and since four had been getting ready to go into town. He was already washed, dressed, and presentable to be seen in public.

Sephiroth nodded, looking pleased. He asked Riku, his tone steady and rich, "Have you eaten today?"

Riku hadn't, but he nodded anyway, his hair falling into his eyes as he did so. Whether his uncle knew he was lying and didn't want to press him or he actually thought Riku was telling the truth, Sephiroth nodded again. "We'll be leaving at eleven thirty today. I have to go to my office and organize some paperwork that one of my colleagues ravaged last night," he said with disdain dripping from his every word. He composed himself quickly, giving Riku an awkward worried glance, as if every time he even spoke with anger Riku would cower before him.

"I'll return soon," he said quietly. "Would you be kind enough to do the dishes before I return?"

Riku nodded, watching as Sephiroth shut the door before he returned to his muted characters.

KH

Saturday morning, afternoon really, Sora woke to the sound of the stair floorboards creaking, followed shortly by his bedroom door opening. He cracked an eye open to see his eldest sibling, Aerith, sneaking up to his bed, trying to tip-toe in her old, worn brown boots. He groaned, wanting more sleep, and knowing she just didn't have that on her agenda for him. Rolling over and snuggling into his pillow, he hoped she would take pity on him, think that he was just too adorable to wake, and leave him alone.

It almost seemed like his plan was plausible. She didn't say anything for at least a good minute, and Sora thought he was home-free. However, after hefting a deep sigh, Aerith gave his shoulder a gentle shake.

"Sora? Will you come to the store with me?" she asked.

"Nuh," was Sora's half-asleep, lack intelligent response.

Aerith gave a long-suffering sigh. "Sora, come on," she insisted in that soft tone of hers. "Get up and come to the store with me," she pleaded, shaking his shoulder.

He groaned pathetically and pulled his blanket up over his head, throwing her hand off of him. "Why do I have to go? Why can't Leon or Roxas go?" he whined. He would feel guilty about hassling her later, but for this precise moment he only wanted more sleep, and he was more than willing to trade his soul for it.

Aerith sighed. "Roxas is at work until three today, and this is Leon's first day off in nine days. I'm not going to make him go."

"Aerith," he pleaded. "School has drained me. I need at least…five more minutes."

"Sora, it's already_ noon!_"

"You've waited this long. Waiting until noon o' five won't hurt."

"You leave me no choice."

His eyes snapped open at the tone she had used, and he went to throw the blankets off of his head, but it was too late. She began squeezing his sides, tickling him through his blankets. With a deep, surprised gasp, he jumped up and away from her, his blanket falling off of him hap hazardously. He wiggled his way into the corner, backing as far as he could away from her while trying to regulate his breathing.

He finally steadied himself, his heart rate coming down. Then, he pouted at her crossing his arms over his chest. Giving her the best glare he could muster, which was pitiful since he had only woken three minutes again, he said, "You are evil, Aerith."

"But you're up," she said with a slight smile.

He groaned, already pulling himself, literally, to the end of his bed towards his dresser. "I'll be down and ready in ten minutes," he grumbled, forcing himself to stand on his stiff, tired legs.

He had obviously slept with his legs folded for a considerable amount of time, because his knees were groaning and popping in protest of him standing. He glared at his only sister, whom still kneeled by his bed, watching him carefully to make sure he wasn't trying to con her into believing he was going to stay awake, only to dive into bed after she left the room. It was her fault his legs hurt. If she hadn't woken him, he could have slept for three, maybe even four more hours in a different position that wouldn't have hurt his legs when he finally dragged himself out of bed.

She just smiled serenely at him as he turned to rummage briefly through his clothing, picking out the first things he saw, because honestly, by the end of the day everything he wore would match somehow. When it was obvious that he was about to change, she stood, dusting off her simple pink sundress. She headed to the door, pausing only to throw him a smile and the grateful comment, "Thank you, Sora."

"Not like I had a choice, Aerith," he shot back, still upset that he was awake.

KH

Riku followed his uncle around the local store they were at for about an hour and he had a feeling he wouldn't get out any time soon. On top of his needed school supplies, Sephiroth had decided to get 

some needed groceries to get them, more Riku since his uncle would be working odd shifts for an unknown amount of time, through the week. These few 'needed' things were actually a list filling an entire piece of paper, because Sephiroth wasn't leaving anything to chance. He had promised he would be home for at least three nights out of the week, but the rest of the time, he and Riku would barely be around each other.

Riku wasn't quite sure how he felt about that. It got lonely enough with him leaving at five in the morning and returning at six. Not having anyone around him from three thirty until seven the next morning that was seriously going to be agonizing. It wasn't like they spoke to each other much anyway, and Sephiroth almost never had a television on, so it was mostly quiet all night, but it was the principle. Riku normally spent a good percentage of his time in the same room as Sephiroth while he did his homework, and afterwards they would simply read a book in the same room. There would be no one home with him.

His mind went on over drive creating scenarios in which he would have no way to reach for help, most involved him calling for help from the police, the fire department, the hospital. If he tried to dial 911, they would want details, and with him being unable to talk they would answer their helpline, and hang up when they heard no one there. He could die and no one would know until his uncle came home and by then it would be too late—could you be any more pessimistic? His mind asked sullenly.

He sighed at his mind, looking over a variety of lunch meat as his uncle had instructed him to do. He probably wouldn't eat any of it, but he had no way to argue with the older man. He supposed he could start taking his lunch to school, perhaps start making lunch for everyone else. He had figured out in the three days he had been at his new school, following Sora's instructions very carefully, that more than half of what the school tried to pass of as food was nothing more than cleverly disguised pig-slop, and the other half was just undisguised pig-slop.

It would give him something to do for about an hour a night—yes, and the other thirteen hours you're awake; you could pick up a new skill, like knitting, his mind bit at him. He vaguely thought that his mind shouldn't give him ideas; he was more than likely to try his hand at knitting now. An image of him knitting like those little old ladies on one of the shows he watched made him smirk as he reached and grabbed a few packages of different lunch meats.

He headed off in search of his uncle, giving a loud whistle when the older man wasn't in his immediate like of sight. A few isles down he heard an answering whistle, and he set off in that direction, feeling relief when he spotted his uncle towering above everyone else. He made his way toward his uncle and the basket which was practically overflowing with the 'few needed' articles they would need to get them through the week—there would have to be ten of you to eat that in a month, forget a week, his mind said incredulously.

He paid it no mind and simply pressed the few packages of lunch meat in where ever he could squeeze it, while his uncle grabbed a few things off the shelf. With those last few items stuffed into the basket or balancing precariously on the top, Sephiroth took a quick glance at his watch, before saying, "There's a 

small phone store on the other side of this building, close to the check out center. We'll go there and then leave."

He nodded, grateful that they would finally be leaving the store. He followed the other man all the way to the other side of the store, seeing several mini-stores within. Sephiroth and Riku went into the store, leaving the cart on the outside. The small structure had a few other people in it, and more than enough sales people. His uncle was automatically swooped down upon by a woman with a painful smile etched on her face. While she was speaking with his uncle, practically ignoring the teen's very existence, Riku looked at the phones that were on display.

He picked out a phone, simple, inexpensive and handed it to his uncle, who nodded at him as the sales woman dragged him off to fill out paperwork and find a plan suitable for them. He stayed back, letting his uncle make everything. There wasn't much he could do regardless. He couldn't add input or make any conversation. Unfortunately, since he was staying by the phones all the sales-people continuously asked him if he had been helped, or if he needed anything, or if he would like to try a plan with them. He looked at is uncle hopefully, wanting to scream in relief when Sephiroth nodded at him from the counter.

Outside of the miniature store, Riku hung about the cart, leaning his elbows on the handle and putting his chin in his palms. It was times like this he really missed being able to speak. If he still had that ability he could still be in the store, chatting with the lady, telling all those other sales persons to buzz off, not feeling like he was all together useless—because the world revolves around you, doesn't it? His mind asked meanly.

He rolled his eyes, thinking that his world revolved around him. It didn't matter about reality, because he wasn't apart of the real world anymore, not really. He could practically feel his mind rolling its nonexistent eyes at his self-pitying attitude.

"Riku!"

He cursed himself when he visibly startled, spinning around in search of the person who had called for him. Oh, look! His mind chirped happily, it's the boy you're not attracted to! Riku rolled his eyes as Sora came bounding up to him, waving his arm above his head. Riku waved back, putting a smirk on his face at the boy's exuberance.

The brunette hopped to a stop in front of him, rocking back and forth on his feet and smiling as he said, "I didn't expect to see you here."

Riku shrugged, his heart calming after the small fright that Sora had given him. They stood in silence for a few moments, Riku watching Sora as he took in everything around them. The brunette looked up at the miniature store he was standing in front of, his bright blue eyes lighting up and a smile growing on his face.

"You're getting a phone?" Sora asked excitedly. He nodded and Sora's smile grew even more. "You'll have texting won't you?" Again he nodded. "Good, I'll give you my number." He reached around into his back pocket, pulling his hand back in front of him with a pen held loosely in his fingers. He grabbed 

Riku's hand, putting it palm up as he poised the pen over his skin. He looked up at Riku from under his lashes, saying, "I can't stay around too long. My sister was ready to check out whenever I spotted you. So pretty much, I've got to give you my number and run." When he was finished with his excessive talking, he began writing on Riku's hand.

"That's my number. Text me when you get your…"

"Who is this, Riku?"

Riku looked up to see his uncle standing behind Sora, mild curiosity lacing his features as he looked down at Sora's spiky hair.

Sora visibly tensed, but forced a big smile on his face as he turned around. He looked up at Sephiroth, his eyes going wide as he took in his uncle's height of 6'3". Intimidation was on his face, even through the smile, but he said, "Oh, sorry. I'm Sora. I go to school with him." He put his hand out, amiably, smile still in place.

For a second, Riku thought his uncle might slap the boy's hand away, but surprisingly he tilted his head, taking Sora's hand in his. "Glad to make your acquaintance, Sora," he said his tone as close to kind as it could get, "I'm Sephiroth, Riku's uncle. You have classes with my nephew?"

Riku blew his hair out of his face, having a feeling that since Sora was with someone who could speak back to him, he would slowly fade away. Sora looked at him though, from the corner of his eye, and said, "No, I don't have any classes with him, but he and my brother do. They share…four classes? Right, Riku?"

Riku's brows rose considerably. He hadn't expected Sora to continuously work to keep him in the conversation. He thought about his classes with Sora's twin, and then held up his hand, indicating he had five classes with Roxas.

Sora smiled at him, making his stomach flutter in that same way that kept his exhaustion away. The brunette smacked his forehead lightly, "Oh! That's right. The two of you have five classes together. I forgot the Roxas switched into your history class as well."

"Sora!"

The three of them looked in the direction that the voice had called from, seeing a slight woman with long brown hair in a pink sundress smiling at them from the end of one of the check out isles. Sora raised his hand vaguely, in a gesture that said 'just a few seconds more.' She nodded and pushed her cart out of the way of the customers behind her, going to sit on a bench.

Sora spun back around to face Riku and his uncle, saying quickly, "I've got to go. It was nice meeting you, Sephiroth. Riku, I'll talk to you later!" He waved at them as he began taking steps backwards to his sister, not having a care in the world, and knowing somehow that there was no one behind him to run into.

"He seems quite talkative," Sephiroth said as they watched Sora run off to meet his sister. "Quite a nice young man."

Riku nodded miserably—see? I'm not the only one, his mind said smugly.

KH

Sora was already home before Riku sent him the very first text message. He had helped Aerith carry the groceries home, and put them away with the help of Leon, who was now up and wandering the house aimlessly. He was almost to his room when his phone started ringing in his pocket. Before he even knew who it was he was smiling, having a feeling…

_Hi. This is Riku and this is my number. You won't believe how long it's taking to write this text._

Sora smiled down at his phone screen, quickly saving Riku's number before he texted his voiceless friend back, taking only three or four seconds to type out the entire message.

_It'll get easier the more you text. Kairi does it so much she doesn't even have to look at the keypad anymore._

He opened the door to his room, not surprised to see his twin on the bed opposite his own, staring up at the ceiling with his hand covering his eyes.

"I thought you were at work until three," Sora said with a cheerful voice as he flopped down on his twin's bed, staring at the ceiling alongside his brother.

Roxas sighed, pulling his hand away from his eyes to glare at his brother's too cheery tone. "Demyx came in early and they let me go home," he said.

Sora was about to reply but his phone went off again, showing that he had another text from Riku. Smiling still at the fact that Riku was talking to him, he read it quickly, eager to see what his friend had to say.

_Are there competitions for this? Because if there are, I say you enter her. You'd probably make a killing._

Sora smiled, not noticing the way his brother was watching him from the corner of his eye.

"Who're you texting?" Roxas asked innocently, staring at his nails to make it seem like he wasn't really interested in what his brother was doing or who he was talking to.

"Riku."

A smirk came over the blonde's face. "What's he saying?"

Sora smiled as his phone went off again. He read it silently, still smiling for reasons beyond himself as he told his twin, "Absolutely nothing."

**A/N: I like this chapter…but at the same time, I think I fouled up somehow. It doesn't seem happy with me. It's looking at me like, 'This is all you have?' It's really annoying.**

**I hope you all liked it though. Thank you all for reviewing me. I hope this continues to be as original as you all like.**

**Please review and tell me how I'm doing, even if you want to complain or leave a suggestion. **

**InnocentGuilt**


	4. Chapter 4

Weeks rolled by into Riku's second month at his new school, and he was surprised at the amount of friends he had gathered despite his inability to speak to any of them. They had figured out their own little ways of communicating with him. Roxas and Namine wrote him notes, which made him feel like he had backtracked into the eighth grade, but were helpful nonetheless. Kairi had begun texting him as well, almost never having her phone put away. Even a few other people 'spoke' to him every now and then. Always randomly in either notes or texting—makes you wonder if someone put your name on a bulletin board or some such likeness, his mind questioned mildly—and even the teachers had begun working with each other so that he had time to write each of them a note after class on what he needed help on, if anything.

He noticed and appreciated them equally, but who stood out among all of them was Sora, who was practically becoming a life line of sorts. Sleepless nights and days were only made better by the sight of him walking towards him in the hall, the sound of his bubbly ringtone, or the random letter that popped out of his locker when he least expected it. The brunette had a knack for showing up in his life just when he needed it. Especially when he was about to pass out, the darkness swarming into his vision almost too quickly to be a dream—nightmare, his mind shot dourly—a Sora interruption would chase the darkness away from him. He gave Riku energy, when Riku should have been practically crawling on the ground with exhaustion.

Of course his mind, beautiful imaginary object that it was becoming all on its own, hadn't stopped badgering him about the oh, so blatant attraction the Riku just had to get for the unique, boisterous teen. It was as if the pesky thing enjoyed making him squirm; enjoyed the effects that such affections brought on his psyche. It refused to stop thinking about him—what else is there to think about? His mind asked coldly.

He huffed, shaking his bangs out of his eyes as he watched his muted television. It was useless to argue with a part of himself, even if that part of himself could have a complete, rational conversation with him. He was practically beginning to think that he should name this part of his mind that ragged on him so often.

'Because that's completely sane,' his mind—maybe he should name it Roger—scoffed. 'Name me Roger and see what happens.'

He snorted, shaking his head. He really was losing it. His mind—perhaps Hannibal—was right. He was totally off his rocker. He was afraid to sleep. He watched his television on mute. He had walls painted to where they practically glowed in the dark, because he was afraid of the dark. And, to top it all off, he was trying to name a voice in his head!

'Hannibal's out, by the way.'

KH

Hours later would find Riku still in his room, still watching his television on mute, but with drowsiness slowly closing in on him. He had done all of his homework thoroughly and now there wasn't a shadow of 

a doubt that he had mastered the syllabus so far. He had even skimmed a few of the other chapters out of sheer boredom. He had done what little his Uncle had asked for him to do today—dishes and a quick straightening of Riku's bedroom—and had even gone ahead to clean the kitchen. There was nothing left for him to do.

Most everyone was at work this Saturday, so there was no one he could text with any regularity. Even Sora, who worked at a local apothecary, worked and he usually had Saturdays and Tuesdays off. He could feel the exhaustion leaking in, calling him, beckoning him to just catch up a little on all the hours of sleep he was missing. It was so enticing, even with the cold that would surely freeze him to the core in his dreams.

He was just_ so_ tired.

His nights these days averaged about two hours of sleep in thirty minute increments. He knew he looked like hell; he didn't see how he couldn't. No one said anything though. Even his uncle, who sometimes watched him worriedly as he ghosted around the house completely oblivious to the life around him, never said anything, and he had figured if anyone were going to say something to him about his haggard appearance, it would be Sephiroth.

He kept nodding off, each time the darkness turned more ominous; the laughter became louder, distinct; the cold was seeping into his bones. But he was too tired to try and shake it off. He felt himself falling further and further into his nightmare, yet he was too weak to pull himself out.

Soon, all he felt was the cold; he was practically numb with it. He couldn't see anything. He knew he was in a room, but what that room was, he had no idea. The laughing was right next to his ear; he could feel the breath of whoever was laughing ghosting over his ear. And something that had never happened before, he felt a hand grabbing for his skin.

He felt himself screaming as the freezing hands actually burned his skin, but the noise of his yelling was muted. The faceless person, who laughed cruelly throughout all these nightmares laughed even louder as he tried so hard to pull away. But just as suddenly the hand was pushed off of him. Warmth actually, finally rolled over him and a voice called,_ "I looked for you!"_

He was jolted awake by his phone playing a happy little tune that reminded him instantly of Sora. He picked up the electronic device and flipped it open, smiling as he saw that the message was from the brunette.

_Hey, I'm off work. How was your day?_

He sat up on his bed, switching his television off, and pressed reply.

**A/N: This is a transition chapter. It wasn't originally a transition chapter, which is why it took so long to write. I had this idea and I wanted that so bad, but it would not work! I fought with it and fought with it! I was so mad that it wouldn't work the way I wanted it to. SO…to prove how mad I was at this chapter I didn't look at it for a month. When I finally went back to it I erased everything and started **

**over. Thus is my poor excuse for this chapter. But I did like this chapter, because I wanted to start the thing with naming his 'mind'. I already have it picked out, but I just love Riku spouting off random names and having his 'mind' nix them. It'll be an ongoing thing through the next chapter.**

**Reviews make me dance like a leprechaun. Really.**

**InnocentGuilt**


	5. Chapter 5

Sora bounded up the steps to the school with his brother in step, albeit not quite as cheerfully, beside him. He looked around immediately for Riku, not noticing the way his twin watched him with amusement. He didn't see the silver-haired teen, though, and he felt his spirits fall a little. He didn't know why, but he always looked forward to seeing Riku. School was fun and all, but his days were really starting to revolve around Riku. Without thinking he started reaching for his right pocket, where his phone nearly always lay. However, Roxas grabbed his hand, causing Sora to look up into his virtual mirror.

Roxas looked at him and said, "He's with the girls."

Sora instantaneously was searching for cinnamon red and starlight blond through the thick crowds of students along with glinting, moonlight silver hair. He would have thought that such a combination would have been exceedingly easy to find, but looking in a crowd of two hundred or so students…it was easier said than done. Roxas sighed expressively, still holding onto Sora's wrist and began tugging him through the hall. Sora didn't see anything for what felt like the longest time and was about to accredit his twin with being delusionary when he finally a quick flash of silver.

"Hey, look!" he said to his twin. "There's Riku."

The blond scoffed. "Wow, what a surprise," he deadpanned, letting go of Sora's wrist as the brunette shot off towards his friend. Roxas watched the other start a seemingly one-sided conversation with Riku, tilting his head at the way they interacted. It wasn't that Sora had befriended Riku; Sora befriended everyone. It wasn't even that Sora could understand what Riku was saying to him without text messaging or notes, though Roxas admitted he found that odd.

It was the way they seemed to be gravitating towards each other. They seemed to look for one another in all the crowds, searching for their life-line in the middle of the sea. They fit together it looked like, even in Roxas' untrained eye. He could see that they were two puzzle pieces that fit together snuggly.

Of course, it didn't hurt that he was Sora's twin. They didn't have any telepathic connection, but there was an awareness of the other at all times. He knew how dependant Sora was becoming on being with Riku. It was almost as like if Sora didn't see Riku smile than his day was ruined. Roxas wasn't jealous of this, as he thought he would be. Sora had always been his brother, his twin, simply his Sora, but as nice as that claim was, Roxas had always wanted more for the brunette.

Roxas had had several relationships, mostly with girls but not necessarily ruling out boys. Sora had been damn near celibate. He had flings, small outings with other people, but that was usually a one date thing and then, boom, Sora was alone again. It was disconcerting and saddening especially when Roxas caught him watching the couples around school with a confused look twisting his face. It was as if the brunette couldn't understand why he didn't have that for himself. Roxas was hopeful that Riku would be good for Sora.

He looked down when someone bumped his shoulder. Namine stood with him, a quiet smile on her face as she looked up at him.

"What?" he asked, drawing a blank as to why she would be smiling like that.

Her smile grew as she looked back at her own twin, Riku, and Sora. "Don't 'what' me. I see you watching him," she said with a warm smile.

He rolled his eyes at her knowing tone, not caring that she was right, only noticing the way that she seemed to see everything that went on in his mind, sometimes better than Sora did, sometimes better than_ he_ did. Deciding to act as if what she had observed was useless and immature to even mention, he said, "I'm sorry if it's a crime to watch my brother. Shall I turn around?" he asked motioning with his thumb towards the crowd behind him.

She cast him a sideways glance, shaking her head lightly. "I don't get why men always have to be so nonchalant about their affections for their siblings, as if they will somehow become less manly if people know they care."

He crossed his arms over his chest, trying to not let it show that she had struck a small nerve with him. Looking back towards his brother, he bit out, "My brother knows I love him. That's good enough for me." He looked back down at Namine, suddenly struck by her pushiness. "What's it matter to you whether I show my 'affections' for Sora or not?" he asked quietly so no one would over hear them.

She twitched her nose, her little way of showing that she was in her thoughtful mood. "I don't know," she said honestly. "You were just staring at him so hard, like you wanted to say something to him."

Roxas smirked at her, still denying her whatever small satisfaction she got out of knowing she was crawling under his skin, and told her, "I want to say something to him, alright." He looked back at the group of three, noticing how close Sora and Riku were inadvertently standing to one another. "But it's something he has to figure out for himself."

From the corner of his eye, he saw Namine looking back and forth between him and Sora. He knew she was wondering what he was talking about, and he took small satisfaction that she didn't know everything.

KH

Riku sat in class next to Kairi, texting to both her and Sora, since his teacher for this class didn't care. Most of his teachers were like that, though there were a few that if they even saw a cell phone, it was confiscated. But this teacher could care less, and was even known for texting to other people along with her students.

_You look tired,_ her text message said.

He raised an eyebrow at that, and pressed reply,_ I'm fine._

_You could take a nap. Ms. Quince won't care._

He rolled his eyes.

'Yeah, because a thirty minute nap with totally make up for months of poor sleep,' his mind—he had been thinking he should name the thing Stewart—snapped.

_I'm a big boy. I can take care of myself,_ he texted back.

His phone buzzed immediately after he sent that text and Riku rolled his eyes, beginning to believe that Kairi needed another hobby besides texting. However, the text wasn't from Kairi. It was from Sora. He smiled as he pressed the 'read' button.

_Do you ever get the feeling that science is trying to kill you?_ Sora's text read.

Riku snorted at that. In the month and a half he had known Sora, he had realized that the guy was completely and totally hopeless and math and science. He had no concept of it, and it wasn't for lack of trying. Sora stared at his text book for entire lunch periods, and it was really just a bunch of jibberish to him.

He texted Sora back,_ Not often. I really only get that feeling with elevators and bleach._ 'And your father,' Stewart added unhelpfully. 'Stop calling me Stewart!'

He tossed his hair out of his eyes, berating the evil voice inside his head. He really didn't want to think about his father. If he let that man back inside his head, he knew he would be back at square one and all the work that his uncle had done with him would be useless.

'Yes, and your dreams have nothing to do with your father do they?' his mind—Jack?—asked rhetorically.

Riku refused to acknowledge the evil little thing, maintaining that his nightmares were stemmed from his fear of darkness, not of his father. Jack—'Can't you find a cool name?' his mind asked desperately—was just pulling at loose strings.

His phone buzzed in his hand, and he pressed read without looking at the name, somehow knowing already that it was from Sora, and it was.

It was simply a one word question._ Bleach?_

Riku's brows furrowed. Bleach, what? He thought back to his previous text, drawing a blank as to why Sora would be asking about bleach. He hated bleach, not that Sora knew that, and if he did, not to the full extent. There were only a handful of people who knew what bleach meant to him, and he had every intention of keeping it that way.

Above him the bell rang, signaling the end of this class. He and Kairi raced to get all of their things gathered and out the door. She made it out the door first, being sleek and thin she was able to maneuver through the crowd easily. When he made it out, he found her waiting for him in the hall, a huge, smug smile on her face as she said, "I win…_ again!_"

Riku raised his eyebrow, circling his index finger in the air sarcastically.

She shouldered him playfully. "You know you're super jealous," she joked as they headed out of the building together, making their way towards their locker building. Namine and Roxas met them halfway to the building, their own class having been in the building in between Riku and Kairi's and the locker building.

"How was your class," Namine asked, hugging her Sociology book to her chest.

Kairi launched into her speech about how useless that class was, declaring how it was pointless to teach a class if the students weren't going to learn anything. Riku wasn't paying attention though. They were close to the locker building, and that meant he would see Sora, if only for a few moments. He ignored the flutter in his stomach and the voice in his head—Cole, he would name it Cole—as he entered the building. He broke off from the other three, who headed towards Namine's locker—Kairi had still yet to get her locker fixed—and headed towards his own.

Sora wasn't there when he arrived to his locker, but Riku wasn't upset. Sora's class was on the other side of the school and sometimes the brunette took his time walking across the campus. Riku slammed his lock against the locker and then entered the combination, throwing his books in after he metal door was open. He was pulling his books out for his next class when he caught Sora, wearing a poorly put together outfit that somehow…matched.

Sora walked up to Riku with his hands in his back pockets, rocking back and forth on his feet when he came to a halt in front of him. Riku looked at him curiously, noticing the small blush that was on the boy's features. Sora removed one hand from his back pocket and rubbed the back of his neck, and finally said, "My teacher took my phone last hour."

Riku smirked and shook his head, shutting his locker door.

Sora nodded pathetically. "Yeah, you would think after having gone to this school for three years, I would know which teachers would snag my phone, but…" he shrugged, giving a small smile as the rest of his sentence. He moved around Riku to his locker which he had somehow rigged to open without him having to enter his combination.

When he had grabbed his books and had his locker shut, he looked up to Riku expectantly, and together they started towards their next classes, which were in the same building but in different rooms.

KH

At lunch their small group crowded around a table with a few sophomores that Riku had never seen. Apparently they were Honor students, and after a month in their regular classes the teachers had decided to transfer them into honor classes, thus taking their lunch period from third to first. But even though Riku personally didn't know them, everyone else did. Apparently the girl was the little sister of one of Roxas' best friends, and the boy was her best friend…in a very retarded way.

"Demyx," the girl—apparently her name was Larxene—said coldly, "Eat your own damn food. Stop stealing from my tray." She pulled her tray away from him and scooted closer to Riku, batting away the boy's fork. "If you wanted what I was eating, why didn't you get it yourself?" she growled.

Demyx, a young man with a girlish figure and a Mohawk-mullet combination, pouted. "I didn't know it would be good," he whined.

Riku shook his head, grimacing at the slop that Demyx was trying to steal from Larxene. He didn't see why she was giving such a fight over that gruel. It didn't look edible; in fact, it looked more likely to eat her and her ridiculous hair-do. Riku shook his head long-sufferingly and turned his head away from the two of them, turning back towards Sora, who was struggling with his Chemistry.

He read over the brunette's shoulder, looking at the question that was on his worksheet. The chapter he was studying was over ionic bonds, and made no sense whatsoever to Sora. Riku had taken Chemistry last year, so he felt as if this was basically a review. He looked at the question again, and then to the page Sora was on.

He sighed and took the book away form the brunette, going back to the beginning of the chapter and flipping through until he found a section the heading he was looking for. He read a few paragraphs and then pointed out the answer to Sora, who stared at the paragraph as if it were in a different language. He took Sora's pen and his notebook and turned to the back, writing down what his own teacher had said last year in a way that Sora would hopefully understand it.

It took a while, but after he handed it back to the brunette to read he knew that he had accomplished his goal. Sora's face lit up with understanding as he read the notes that Riku had given him.

"Thanks, Riku!" he said, smiling up at the older teen. He pulled the notes closer to the worksheet and snatched his pencil back out of Riku's grasp. Riku watched him for a few moments to make sure he had gotten the gist of what he had explained and after he positive Sora understood, he returned his attention to the table around him…which was loud.

He wasn't sure how he had missed all the noise. Larxene was looking murderously at Demyx, who apparently hadn't taken her warning to heart and was now practically sitting in Roxas' lap. Roxas was yelling at him to get off, and Kairi and Namine were laughing uncontrollably at the looks everyone was wearing. Riku cocked his head to the side, looking at the mayhem that had broken out at their table. He knew he could zone a lot out when he was with Sora—his tiredness, his phobias, Chuck (Cole was too boring a name for his mind) most the time—but to mute out the beginnings of a war…that was just ridiculous.

'Oh, the power of teenage infatuation,' Chuck—maybe Derrick—said dreamily.

Riku rolled his eyes at the voice—not Derrick. Sprite.—and watched as Larxene took her pastry from her tray and smeared it all over Demyx's face.

"Oh, Larxene!" Demyx wailed. "I hate blueberry! Couldn't you have gotten strawberry?"

Riku looked around the cafeteria for any form of restraint coming to get the two sophomores, because lord knew at his old school, Larxene wouldn't have even been able to look at Demyx in a threatening manner. However the teachers were all at their table at the other end of the room, talking amongst themselves and generally ignoring the room in general. He looked back to his table. Roxas was depositing Demyx back into his chair with a disgusted look and a bit of blueberry on the side of his face. The girls were quieting down. Kairi was handing Demyx her napkins, while Namine wiped Roxas' cheek with her napkin.

Roxas glared at Demyx mutinously, biting out through clenched teeth, "If you ever do that again, I will make a piñata out of you!"

Riku raised his brow at that. When Roxas looked at him, Riku tilted his head questioningly at him. The older blonde all but yelled, "He fucking kissed my cheek with that blueberry goop all over his face."

Demyx looked quite proud of himself, and even Larxene gave him a pat on the back.

Riku smirked at Roxas and shrugged, snorting when he heard the blonde breathe out, "Some help you are." Namine grabbed his face then and continues cleaning his face with a napkin she had dunked in her water.

A hand was on his arm, and Sora's urgent voice rang in his ears, "Okay, pay attention to me again!" Riku smiled at that as he looked back over to Sora who was shoving his book and paper towards him. The brunette looked at Riku earnestly as his finger went over two paragraphs in a circle. "Will you explain this to me in the English language?" he begged, his overly blue eyes wide and pleading.

He could already hear S—'Don't you dare call me Sprite, you love-sick puppy!'—Stephen saying, 'Isn't he just so cute like that?'

Riku ignored the voice, reading over the paragraphs Sora had pointed out. He nodded to himself afterwards and began rewriting them over in Sora-understandable words. He handed both the paper and the book back to Sora who read it and yelled, "This rocks!" He looked up at Riku, a smile still on his face and asked, "Can we meet after school so you can help me with this junk?"

Riku thought about it for a moment, already knowing the answer but just running it over with himself. He grabbed the paper from Sora, and wrote,_ can we meet at my house?_

Sora nodded just as the bell rang. "Sounds awesome," he said as he gathered up his papers and book. The others went ahead of them, but Riku waited for Sora to get his things together. They walked back to their lockers together, Sora talking about how awesome it was that Riku could figure out a way to explain science to him without simply giving him the answers. Riku listened and nodded, but subconsciously he felt the anxiousness eating at him.

Sora was coming over to his house. There was something daunting about that. Would he say something about the colours of his room? Should he actually watch the television with the volume on? He had left his dirty laundry in his room! He should have taken it to the garage, where the washing machine was.

'Sounds like you're trying to impress him,' his mind—Mickey! That was it—said. 'Not Mickey!'

Definitely Mickey.

**A/N: So…this practically typed itself, which I like. And thank god! It did what I freaking wanted it to! I got so mad.**

**So, I pretty much loved writing this chapter, so if you could review and tell me if you liked reading it…I will give you a sugar cookie!**

**InnocentGuilt**


	6. Chapter 6

Sora ran up to Roxas at Namine's locker after his last class of the day, nearly slamming into the blonde with the momentum he had built up. His twin was bracing hard against the almost-impact, and his face was screwed up comically. Sora would have laughed, but he was too excited. "I'm going over to Riku's this afternoon," he said giddily. He was enthralled for reasons he couldn't even begin to explain, not to mention a little nervous. He had met Riku's uncle once and that man was_ terrifying!_ However, his smile would not be moved. "Will you tell Aerith or Leon that I won't be home 'til later tonight?"

The blonde smirked at him, his eyes glittering. "You're going over to Riku's, huh?" he teased.

Sora didn't notice. He just nodded happily, again. "Yeah! Will you tell them? Please?"

His twin sighed, as if what he was being asked to do was life-threatening and unbelievable. Sora for a moment thought that he was going to be an ass and tell him no just for the fun of it, but suddenly Roxas smiled as much as Roxas allowed himself to smile. "Sure thing."

Sora all but jumped on him, yelling his thanks loud enough for the entire hall to hear. Roxas struggled under his twin's strong grip, grumbling, "Get off of me, Sora. People can see!"

Sora let go of him and backed away, not looking sorry at all for his sudden attack on his brother. His huge smile ate up his face, and his eyes glittered with happiness. "Thanks, Roxy."

He glared at the nickname as Sora spun around and galloped off to meet his silver-haired friend.

KH

The saying, 'Time flies when you're having fun,' was only part true. Time was flying for Sora, but he sure as hell wasn't having fun. No one could have fun watching someone right notes of Chemistry and then answering questions with those notes. That was really the most boring thing Sora could think of…second to maybe weeding Aerith's garden with her. However, the time he was spending with Riku in the older boys living room made time zip by faster than he could recognize.

Somehow, just being with Riku made him content.

And he relaxed, thanking any deity that would listen that Sephiroth wasn't home.

Sora looked at Riku, who was focused on re-writing the entire text book for him. Sora had to admit, even to himself, the other boy was beyond stunning. His silver hair glittered and his eyes were like angelic, one look and they could take you to heaven. His skin was pale, if not stretched. He was well toned; Sora felt an unbelievable urge to touch his arm, to feel the muscles moving beneath his skin as he wrote.

Sora flushed as he realized what he was thinking.

This was his friend, his_ male_ friend. It wasn't as if he was ashamed of being attracted to another boy, many people he knew had at one point or another. But he himself had never felt this attraction to another boy. He had been pretty sure that he was straight. Although thinking about it, he had never felt any true attraction to a girl. They were cute, and he liked the way they spoke to him most the time. He 

thought it was funny when the cute, prim girls started sexual banter. But other than that he had never felt the compulsion to kiss them.

However with Riku…with Riku there was no denying now that he had truly seen him that he wanted to kiss him, touch him, hold him…be held by him.

The muscles of his forearm continued to jump and flex as he wrote and against Sora will, he found his own hand moving over to feel the movement, to feel the texture of that flawless skin. The moment their skin was connected Sora felt a jolt go through his fingertips, which made his face super-heat. He had never felt anything like this with any other person. It was exciting and frightening.

However, at the same time Riku flinched and jerked back. Sora let his hand hover in the air where Riku's arm had been, and his eyes darted to meet those heavenly eyes. They were tired, and for the first time Sora noticed the darker shades that circled them. But what struck Sora was the fact that his eyes were scared. Not startled, or shocked…scared. Like he feared the simple touch that Sora had just given him.

Sora pulled his hand back into his lap, hesitantly, keeping eye-contact with Riku. "I'm sorry…" he said, faltering as Riku's eyes faded from fear to regret. He closed his eyes as if he was in physical pain by the simple brush of skin against skin. It was so potent on his face that even Sora felt that pain.

He cleared his throat awkwardly. Riku's eyes fluttered open and the pain that was evident tore at the brunette more than he was willing to admit. His breath caught in his throat and he nearly choked on his own tongue. "I'm sorry," he managed to breathe, wringing his hands in his lap. He looked across the living room to the clock that was on the wall. "It's seven. I should probably be going home."

Quietly he gathered his things from in front of Riku who still stared at him with tormented eyes. Sora wanted to ask what was wrong with him, if it had been himself who had caused Riku pain, if there was any way he could take it back. But it would be moot when all he would receive was silence.

This was the first time that Riku's inability to talk really bothered Sora. He didn't know what to do with Riku at that moment. Whatever Riku was thinking was kept firmly inside the boy, with no way of being released.

Riku walked him to the door where a few lines of awkward one-sided conversation took place.

"Thanks for helping me with my homework," Sora said staring down at the floor embarrassed. He dared a glance up at the eyes that had just taken his breath away not twenty minutes ago, ones he really should have noticed sooner or better yet…not at all.

Riku shook his head, silver strands waving with the movement, silently telling Sora that it was no problem, or maybe that he couldn't believe Sora had touched him, or perhaps just that Sora shouldn't say anything either; Sora didn't know. He handed Sora the notebook filled with the notes he had been making and opened the door, letting Sora out into the fading sunlight to walk home.

KH

Riku shut the door with a quiet click before he slid to the ground.

He couldn't believe this. He couldn't believe he had nearly jumped out of his skin just because of a harmless little touch. It hadn't been sexual, or harmful, or anything with meaning. It had probably only been to get his attention, but Riku had completely wigged. Now he had probably lost the only real friend he had.

For just one moment, one quick…never-ending second he had been back with his father._ Fuck!_ Why couldn't he forget the bastard already? Why did that prick have to haunt him? Why did he still have to fear what was never going to touch him again?

Why didn't he stop Sora before he left?

He put his head into his hands, wanting to scream so bad!

'If only you could,' Mickey said, uselessly.

He lashed out at the voice, yelling at it as he pulling his silver hair that it was being of any fucking help. He knew he couldn't scream. He fucking knew it! Everyone knew it! It was the basis for many a gossip and rumor mill anywhere he went. They all wanted to know why he couldn't speak. They were all so fucking nosey. Any friends that he had gained were only really his friends so they could fulfill their curiosity and discover the reason behind Riku's being mute.

'Except Sora,' Mickey added calmly, unaffected—as any disembodied voice should be—that Riku had been mentally lashing out. 'And you just let him walk out the door, without rhyme or reason.'

He knew that too.

He pulled his head out of his hands, subconsciously running his hand over the place where Sora had touched him. Despite the initial shock of being touched, being transported to a world he should forget ever existed, he felt it tingle, even now. He could still feel the warmth of Sora's palm against his skin, flooding throughout his body.

'You shouldn't have let him go.'

And what if he hadn't? He found himself wondering. Not that there was anything leading him to believe that Sora's touch had been anything more that a way to get his attention, gently, but there was no denying the way he had reacted. He had panicked, fully and without a doubt. If Sora had stayed it would have led to questions that he couldn't answer, looks that he couldn't handle, and gossip that he couldn't fix. There was no doubting that.

But, god, he felt like a heel for letting Sora apologize to him as if it had been the brunette's fault. He should have at least corrected that. What that boy must be thinking…that he had hurt Riku, that he had angered him?

His jaw worked and he gripped his own arm hard enough to bruise.

He was such a prick and he had probably just lost the only person who could understand him.

'At least you weren't interested in him, right?' his mind asked coldly.

That made him feel loads better.

KH

Sora's house was a good thirty minute walk away from Riku's, but as slow as Sora was walking it took closer to an hour. He couldn't believe he had done that. He didn't even know what he had done! He had just touched Riku. It was just skin grazing skin, for goodness sake. What the hell had he done wrong?

The look in Riku's eyes…Sora just wanted to go back in time and undo that simple touch. Anything to get that haunted look, that look of pain out of his eyes. He felt so guilty and he didn't even know what he had done wrong.

If only Riku could talk to him…

He opened the door to his house and dropped his bag, uncaringly on the floor. His Chemistry was done. He would work on the rest of it tomorrow morning before school started. Heaving a deep sigh, he moved into the kitchen, ready to make a quick sandwich. He hadn't eaten anything at Riku's house, not wanting to look like a pig, or anything. Now that he hadn't eaten in since noon, he was ready to devour a cow.

However, once he was in the kitchen, he was met by Aerith and Leon sitting at the table. Aerith looked shocked and worried, and Leon just looked angered. He tried to hazard a guess as to why they would be looking at him like that. He had told Roxas…_Roxas!_

If his twin hadn't told Leon and Aerith, he would strangle him. He wasn't in the mood for his twin to have suddenly decided to pull a fast one on him. He had too much on his mind and he felt like the rug had just been pulled out from under him. He didn't need for Roxas to have done the same thing.

With a sigh, he hung his head. "Did I do something wrong?" he asked, tiredly, flopping his hands down by his side.

"Where were you?" Leon growled.

Aerith shot him a worried glance. "Leon…" she chastised. "We know where he was. Roxas told us he was at Riku's."

Okay, so he wouldn't have to kill his twin.

Leon whipped around to glare at the eldest sibling, which she met calmly. "We have no reason to doubt him," she said.

Leon turned his head slowly to look back at Sora, his serious eyes pinning the youngest down like a fly. He resisted the urge to fidget under his brother's stare. He was seventeen for Heaven's sake. Leon took a deep breath, probably to steady his anger. "Why didn't you answer your cell phone?"

"My teacher took it away from me at school. I can't get it until one of you come and reclaim it for me." Sora looked down at the floor. He didn't need to see their disappointment.

Aerith sighed and Leon muttered out something that sounded like, 'fucking figures.' Sora shook his head, clenching his jaw subconsciously.

"How did you manage that, Sora?" Leon asked.

When Sora jerked his head up, he saw Leon rubbing his temples tiredly. Sora grimaced. It wasn't like he did it on purpose. And it sure as hell wasn't as if it happened everyday. This was the first time he had gotten his phone taken this year; it was the only thing he had gotten in trouble for his entire school career. If that was all Leon had to worry about Sora getting in trouble over after their parents' death, that bastard should be damn proud!

He and Roxas were model students compared to what Leon had been. And Leon had been spoiled.

He shook his head angrily. "I threw it at the teacher," he said snidely. "How do you think I got my phone taken from me?"

"Sora!" Aerith gasped and Leon glared.

The younger man in the room frowned and scratched the back of his neck. "Sorry. You don't have to get my phone for me. I obviously don't deserve it." He turned and left the kitchen, forget the food. He didn't want it anymore.

Behind him he heard Leon call his name and Aerith tell Leon to let him go.

He dashed upstairs, knowing that his brother was already in the room. He threw the door open tiredly and stumbled in, surprised when it wasn't just his brother, but also his brother's best friend, Axel, Larxene's older brother.

"Hey, Axel," Sora said with a small, surprised wave. "Haven't seen you around in a while."

Axel, sitting on Sora's bed, glanced at Roxas who was sitting on his own bed. He smiled a little, more like a smirk-sneer combination. "I know, right. Roxas and I had a small fallout."

"Over what?" His curiosity was minimal, but he liked Axel enough to keep a relative amount of conversation going on between them.

"None of your business," Roxas snapped, glaring at Axel. "We just had a small argument. Leave it at that, Sora."

Sora nodded slowly. "Sure thing, Roxy."

The blonde and the redhead looked over Sora worriedly. Usually the youngest of the group would be all over the two of them for answers if Roxas had answered his question like that. Tonight, he just seemed resigned.

"What's wrong with you, Rainbow?" Axel asked

Roxas nodded along with the question. "Yeah, did something happen at Riku's?"

Axel snapped his head around to Roxas. "Who's Riku?"

"No, nothing happened," Sora lied as he went to his dresser to rummage for something to sleep in. "Just a long walk home. I'm feeling kinda tired."

"Who's Riku?" Axel asked more persistently.

"Our new friend at school. Sora and him are pretty close," Roxas answered distractedly. His twin wasn't telling the truth. Something had happened. He just knew it, but he didn't want to make Sora talk about it, especially not in front of Axel. The redhead had a protection streak three miles wide. So instead he asked, "Did you get your homework all sorted out?"

Sora nodded. "Yeah. Got it all done."

"That's good. You gonna go over their every time your homework turns out smarter than you are?" he asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"With Rainbow, that'll be every day." Axel's poor attempt at a joke wasn't met the way it normally was.

"Fuck off, Axel."

The two stared at him in shock, not expecting such a hot-tempered reaction. Something was definitely up.

"Hey, Rainbow, you sure you're okay?" Axel asked worriedly, getting up to move towards the brunette. "It takes a lot to make you use volatile language."

"I'm fine," Sora assured. "Can you guys go downstairs or something? I'm gonna go to bed."

"It's only eight-forty," Axel said, looking at his watch. He reached out to touch Sora, but Sora moved back, glaring at Axel.

"Thank you, Mr. Cuckoo Clock," he snapped. He continued to glare at Axel for a few moments before he shook his head again, trying to clear himself of the uncharacteristic bad mood. "Roxy, please?" he begged.

Roxas nodded, not even trying to correct him of the nickname he hated. "Come on, Axel. Let's go downstairs."

The redhead looked like he was about to argue, but Roxas settled him with a glare Axel could never argue with. They moved over to the door. They were almost out of the room, when Roxas turned back. "Night, Sora."

"Yeah, night, Rainbow."

Sora waved at them, not meeting their gaze and moving to pull his shirt over his head. Roxas and Axel shut the door behind them on their way out, wondering what was wrong with the normally chipper teen. It wasn't like him at all to be like this, and they both wondered what had happened at Riku's house. Roxas almost pulled out his phone to text his new friend but thought better of it. He wouldn't interrogate him until Sora had confessed something. Although if he didn't confess soon, Roxas was ready to get out the spot light and drill the answers out of the mute boy.

He looked up to Axel who was staring at the bedroom door with a look on his face that said he, too, was ready to track down Riku. However, when he felt Roxas' eyes on him, he turned away from the door. They stood their in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes, just staring at each other, then down at the floor or walls.

Finally, Axel said, "Well, it's getting kind of late. I should be going home."

Roxas nodded quickly.

"Thanks for letting me come over, Roxas. Call me later." He looked at the door one more time, behind which Sora was crawling into bed and beating himself up over what happened at Riku's. Shaking his head he moved downstairs, Roxas behind him, and left the house.

KH

Axel pulled up to his apartment complex, parking in the space in front of his house, and noticing that a beat up, P.O.S. car was in the parking space next to his. A very familiar beat up, P.O.S. car. He shook his head affectionately as he got out of his vehicle and moved up to unlock his door.

The first thing he noticed when he entered his apartment was that it smelled like bleach. He covered his nose and mouth with his hand as he moved into his cramped living room, where Larxene and Demyx were. Demyx was sitting in a chair, while Larxene moved around him with a hair dyeing brush and a small tub of bleach.

He smiled under his hand. "Shouldn't you two be asleep, or studying for school?"

Larxene stopped what she was doing and leveled him with a glare. He was getting a lot of glares tonight. It must be his charming personality. Demyx, though, lovely, sweet, Demyx turned around and smiled.

"It's only nine," he said with a goofy, lop-sided smile. "And we did our homework hours ago."

"Yeah. So bug off."

Axel snorted at his little sister. "My apartment."

"I'm meaner," she said snidely.

Axel couldn't argue that, so he moved around the two of them and sat down on his couch. Noticing the television was on, playing a show he didn't recognize, he picked up the remote and put it on the comedy channel.

"Hey, I was watching that!" Larxene yelled.

"No, you weren't. You were dyeing my hair."

She glared down at Demyx, who had dared disagree with her and threatened, "Unless you want to wake up bald, I suggest you shut it!"

Demyx cowered before her and made a motion of zipping his lips. She grinned, thoroughly satisfied and continued to work on his hair, not really caring that Axel had changed the channel. She had just wanted to yell at him.

The girl had to believe that yelling was a championship sport.

He watched the comedian for a few minutes before he turned back to the two of them. "Do you know a Riku at school?"

Larxene glanced up briefly. "Yeah. He's a nice enough kid. He doesn't say much."

"He doesn't say anything. He's mute," Demyx interrupted quickly.

Larxene smiled down at him, meanly. "Which is why I like him so much. You should take a lesson from him, Jabber-jaws."

Demyx pouted up at her, which she ignored fully.

"He and Sora hang out a lot?" Axel asked, thinking back to his wholly upset friend, the way he had seemed so sullen.

Larxene nodded as she picked out another piece of Demyx's mullet-Mohawk.

Demyx expanded. "Yeah, he and Sora are practically inseparable. Anytime the two aren't in class or at home, they're together. It's kinda cute."

The girl snorted. "You would think so. You think romance novels are the stuff of legends."

Axel smiled. "Just because you have more testosterone than most of the men in this country have combined…" he let his sentence fall as his sister turned around and placed her hand on her hip.

That was probably not the best thing to say to her. The girl had anger management problems and Axel wouldn't put it past her to kill him. He may be her older brother, but that just meant he worked her nerves the easiest and was more prone to end up six feet underground. The worst part was…he doubted she would even be a suspect.

"You shouldn't say things like that if you don't want to wake up looking like Cruella de Vil," she growled.

He didn't say anything. He just petted his hair, his pride and joy. He watched her as she finished up Demyx's hair and when he though he could talk to them again without his sister snapping at him, he continued on with their conversation.

"You don't think this Riku-kid would do anything to hurt Sora do you?"

"No!" they answered simultaneously, looking at him as if he had lost him mind.

Demyx shook his head with a small smile growing on his face. "Riku…he adores Sora, in a way equal to Roxas but totally different. He can't talk, right. Well, Sora can understand, like, anything he tries to say without even trying. Riku likes that; he likes Sora period. Riku wouldn't risk hurting Sora."

Larxene nodded along with everything Demyx said, fixing pieces of his hair so they didn't mess up as he talked. When he was finished talking, she asked Axel, "Why do you ask?"

The redhead only shrugged. "Just wondering."

The two blondes didn't question further. They waited for Demyx's hair to finish and when he went to the shower, Larxene got her clippers out so she could cut the sides of his mullet-Mohawk. Axel was left wondering what had Sora so upset.

KH

_The smell of bleach permeated his senses, stuck to his skin so well that no amount of soap would ever be able to wash it away. It was dark, and the shrill laughter was piercing his ears._

"_I'll teach you, faggot! I'll teach you!"_

_Hands grabbed him by his throat; tilting his head back and forcing his mouth open to struggle for breath. He tried to grasp at the hands, but they were too strong for him. He tried kicking out, but with each kick he lost more oxygen and energy. His kicks became weaker; his struggling was subsiding, even as his mind screamed for him to just try a little harder. _

_The laughing continued as the cold hand of death shot through him. _

"_I told you, I would kill you. You should have just kept you fucking hands to yourself. You're not pure enough to touch anyone else. You corrupt everyone around you…"_

Riku woke up gasping for air, his hands coming up to check his neck. Tears poured down his face, clouding the dark room, causing him to panic. He couldn't see anything! He couldn't feel anything! He was_ so_ fucking cold. The laughter rang in his ears, growing louder and louder and he struggled away from it, falling out of his bed, clenching his eyes shut. That only allowed it to grow worse. The darkness became darker, the laughter became shriller…

He had to get away!

"Riku!"

Hands touched his back and arms, trying to kill him again! He was coming after Riku again!

"Riku, wake up! You're fine! You're_ fine_!" The hands on his arms shook him. "Open your eyes."

'You're safe here,' Mickey coaxed.

Riku opened his eyes, still struggling with the hands on his arms and was shocked to see the blues, greens, and yellows of his room. He wasn't in the dark! He turned around quickly, still a little disoriented to find sea-blue eyes looking at him with concern. Not amber…they weren't…they didn't belong to…

Tears still pouring down his cheeks, Riku looked at the floor, studying the wood until he came back to himself. He lived with his uncle now. He was safe. It had only been a dream. There was no bleach, and no one was going to kill him. He was safe. Safe.

He looked up at his uncle. 'Sephiroth,' Mickey corrected mildly. 'He has a name.'

The man looked strained, tired. He had been working so much, too much, trying to catch up with everything at work, and dealing with Riku. He shouldn't have to do this. He should have to put up with Riku's nightmares, silence, and malfunctions. Riku didn't deserve it, and once Sephiroth found out about his attraction to Sora, his uncle wouldn't think he deserved it either.

'He's not like that,' his mind argued. He wanted to believe Mickey, but he just couldn't…not after everything…

"Are you alright?" Sephiroth asked tiredly, his imperial voice clouded, oddly enough, with worry.

Riku nodded and rubbed his hand over his face. However, he stopped when he caught the aroma of his skin.

_Bleach?_

He shook his head feeling dizzy and nauseous. His stomach lurched and before he had even commanded his legs to do so, he was running to the bathroom.

**A/N: Well…that was exciting. Sorry it took so long. I'm a full time student, and I went year round…I'm pooped. I do love this story and I'm not giving up on it. It just might take some time in between updates. I'm sure you know the drill. **

**Okay, I have a question for my lovely readers. Who would you rather see Roxas with? Axel or Namine? Both are up in the air at the moment and I would like to see what my lovely readers would like to read.**

**I hope you still like this story, despite its swamped author.**

**InnocentGuilt**


	7. Chapter 7

Riku was slow to rise in the morning. Sephiroth had given him one of his sleeping pills, which Riku rarely took for the main reason that he didn't want to_ sleep_. However, Sephiroth had urged him to take it. His uncle had told him he knew how little the amount of sleep he had been acquiring over the past few months and had chalked it up to the stress of a new town. The nightmare Riku obviously had, had caused Sephiroth to reassess such a prognosis and now the prescription that Riku had not been taking along with an appointment with his psychologist had been enforced.

The young man rolled over in his bed, feeling stiff and sore and all together miserable in a way he couldn't describe. All the sleep he had, it wasn't enough for his mind, but it was too much for his body, which was used to only being still for short amounts of time. The sleeping pill he had taken last night had finally knocked him out cold, after wrestling with sleep for an hour, but being unable to occupy his mind with something as Sephiroth had taken vigil by his bedside until he had finally succumbed.

He padded out of his room, knowing that Sephiroth would be waiting in the kitchen—'Like a watchdog,' Mickey said overly cheerfully. Riku ignored the damned voice and continued with dread worming through his system. His uncle would surely be waiting to cart him off to an orphanage. He would be waiting to abandon Riku, or worse…there was always so much worse than being left alone. At least if he was left alone there wasn't any pain. He swallowed painfully as he entered into the kitchen, seeing as he had known he would Sephiroth sitting at the table with a cup of tea and a journal in his hand.

He looked up as soon as his nephew entered the room. In that second, Riku was reassured that nothing bad would happen to him. His uncle_ wasn't_ his father. His uncle wouldn't put him in pain and he wouldn't abandon him. His mind knew that. Mickey didn't have a doubt about Sephiroth, but his heart was restless. Riku had a special talent, and that was getting people angry at him. Slowly, he shuffled to the seat opposite the man at the small table. He didn't know what was coming, but he knew his uncle preferred to have conversations while sitting down like civil humans.

Sephiroth's sea-green eyes leveled on him as he settled. He watched as Riku tried to get comfortable and when he stopped moving around he said calmly, "I called Dr. Rosewood. She will be meeting with you this afternoon. I know I said the psychiatrist appointments would lesson with school, but it's obvious to me that perhaps you should keep the same schedule as before." He took a small sip of his tea, still looking at Riku as if he expected protest.

'As if you could!' Mickey said.

Riku rubbed his eyes as if to silence the voice, but nodded to his uncle. Even if he could protest, he wouldn't. After what Sephiroth had seen Riku would be stupid to try and go against his uncle's wishes, even though he hated his psychiatrist. If Sephiroth thought he needed help, Riku would not be one to argue. His uncle was just trying to help; he knew that deep down, even when his mind was trying to deny it.

He looked up when his uncle scooted his chair away from the table. His eyes searched wildly, wondering why the man had so abruptly stood. A part of him wondered if the man had finally come to his senses and realized that Riku wasn't worth the effort, and that made him angry. He knew his uncle would do anything for him, but a part of him still believed that it was all just a joke. For the past three months, he had lived here, for the past six the man had been taking care of him, and he still felt as if all of the reassurances were for naught. He was always just a hairs breadth from running like he would have if it had been his father, but then he would see his uncle's eyes and they weren't cold amber staring him down with malice.

He was tired of being unsure. He was tired of being confused. Just seconds ago he had been convincing himself that Sephiroth was trying to help, but now…the abrupt movement of metal chair-legs against tile wiped that all away.

Sephiroth gave him a calming look, seeming to know what was haunting Riku's thoughts and said, "I'll make you breakfast. You'll dress yourself and be ready to leave after you eat."

Riku nodded stiffly and backtracked into his room, still feeling tired and for the first time in years ready to succumb to his nightmares rather than fight for his sanity. He was ready for anything if it meant he wasn't confused all the time.

Confusion was going to be the end of his life. Confusion had led him to doubting his uncle. Confusion had led him to estrange Sora…_ Sora_!

'Oh, yeah! You're not-attraction,' Mickey said smugly.

Confused, tired, why not add misery to the mix?

Why did he let the brunette leave yesterday? He should have at least made an effort to rein the boy back in. Maybe he should have explained a little bit. He could have made up a lie. He was good at lying, had relied on it back in his hometown. There was no reason he couldn't have stopped Sora from leaving. But it was too late now. Sora probably wouldn't want to talk to a boy who, not only couldn't talk, but apparently couldn't be touched either.

KH

"Sora!" His science teacher's voice startled him just as he passed the office on the way to his locker. He turned around sharply to gaze at the tall man with dull eyes. His teacher held up his phone in his hand, waving it around in the air. "Your brother called me this morning. You can have your phone back but it had better stay off during the remainder of the day."

Sora gazed at him curiously. His brother had called? It had to have been Leon. Every teacher knew Roxas and Sora's voices like the back of their hands and the twins couldn't imitate anyone to save their lives. But Leon had been so pissed off last night. There's no way he would have called for him, even if Aerith had chastised him all night for being an ass. Leon was set in his ways and once he made up his mind there was no going back.

He walked up to his teacher, taking the phone back into his hand and staring at it curiously. He wondered what was going on, what could possibly possess his brother to do such a thing, but he wasn't going to argue. He didn't have the energy to argue. He looked at it sadly, wondering if perhaps Riku had texted. He wanted to turn it on and check but there was no way for him to do that without getting his phone taken away from him yet again.

Remembering what little manners he had, he said, "Thanks," and put the phone in his pocket, before walking away.

Roxas met up with him at his locker, looking worried as he watched his melancholy twin. He still had not been shaken from his mood. He had shed some light to his mood. Something about his phone and Leon had him in a tizzy, but Roxas suspected that there was something more. Something to do with Riku. He opened his mouth to say something, to ask how he was, maybe pull more out of his twin, but Sora cut him off.

"I'm going to class."

He brushed passed his blonde twin and made quickly away from him, making it vividly clear that he didn't want to be stopped. He didn't even stop to say anything to the girls and they both waved at him hesitantly as he flew by. Roxas sighed and leaned against the locker, staring after his twin with worried eyes.

KH

"How are you, Riku?" his psychiatrist, Yuna Rosewood, asked not bothering to look at him, but typing something on her computer. Her prissy glasses sat primly on top of her nose, not that she seemed to need them. They were all the way down her nose, and she looked over them.

He was sure she was a nice person outside of the office she locked them in, but he wasn't so fond of her. He wasn't so fond of anyone in this field of business. His mind was his own haven…

'Some haven,' Mickey scoffed.

…and he didn't want anyone else trying to encroach on its territory.

He shrugged, staring at the overstuffed chair he was seated in. There was nothing wrong with it, but it was something to stare at.

"I heard you've been having nightmares."

He nodded, still staring at his chair. It was ugly, and multicolored, but oddly enough it reminded him of Sora and his atrocious clothing that somehow always matched. He smirked at that and rolled his eyes. He was in the middle of a mental breakdown and he was thinking about Sora, who may or may not ever speak to him again.

'You're glutton for punishment,' Mickey said flippantly.

Riku had to admit, that yes, he was. He was born into a conservative community and luck of luck, he turned up interested in boys more than girls. He couldn't even hide it. He tortured himself with not sleeping and all but cast himself to the wolves if he did sleep. And to top it all off, he was falling for a young man who may never want to even look his way again. He had lost it. Really, there was nothing else to it.

His entire life had been set up for failure. From the second he was born to the second is mother left to the second he wasn't allowed to die thanks to a nosy neighbor who had called the police, life had not meant for him to win. Why should it change its mind just because he got new surroundings?

"Can you tell me what they're about?"

He looked up at her sharply, a glare piercing her.

Mickey all but sighed. 'For a commonly used phrase, it stings like hell when you can't partake in the simplicity of it, now doesn't it?'

Riku shook his hair out of his face as he thought he had been around his uncle too long. Mickey's vocabulary was expanding rapidly, and it was taking more thought process than he wanted to expend to understand him.

From in front of him, Dr. Rosewood apologized, but it wasn't heard above Mickey's offhand comment. "I'm sorry. Can you express to me what they're about?" He didn't move. "Would you like a pen and paper? You could write it down."

He shook his head, 'no' and returned to staring at his seat.

"It's better to let your fears out, Riku. Face them, instead of keeping them hidden. Was your dream about your father…about what he did to you?"

Images of his father flashed in his mind, the smell of bleach, whispers of fists against skin. Cold amber eyes stared at him, haunting him, laughing maliciously at him. His heart picked up speed. He couldn't do this. She wouldn't make him do this. He had been holding out for months, not thinking of his father, not remembering his past. He would be damned if he let her shake his foundation now.

'Think of Sora,' Mickey soothed.

That was so much easier to think of, right up until he got to the part where he had let the boy leave last night! Thinking of his father would be preferable to that self-hatred.

'I, somehow, doubt it.'

"I know what you're going through is rough," Dr. Rosewood continued. "Not being able to communicate with anyone, having to live with a man you barely know and not only that but whose kith and kin to your father. I bet it must anger you to stare at your uncle's face and only see your father."

Riku's panic calmed mildly, lending to anger at the accusation he was sure she was making. His hand twitched at the thought.

Whether or not she sensed the beginnings of his hostility, she changed the subject. "What about your school? Are you making any friends?" She didn't even give him time to respond, and that made his blood boil hotter. "It must be difficult to associate with others your age when your ability to speak has been taken from you. It must be difficult to do anything with the situation you're in. Do they treat you alright there?"

Now he remembered clearly why he hated coming to these people. Not only were they nosy, they were condescending.

"Does anyone try to hurt you there, Riku?" He looked at her daringly. "A boy your age, with your background, suffering the turmoil you're in, not to mention that you can't scream for help, I'm not saying that you're weak by any means, but you would be a viable target. Is that what sparked your nightmare? Did someone try to hurt you?"

Riku shook his head again, his heart hammering and his breathing labored. He felt his self-worth diminishing as his anger grew. Who was she to make him feel like this? Who was she to tear him down further than he already was? He really hated her right now.

"Do you know what did cause your nightmare?"

Riku shook his head vigorously, considering giving her an obscene gesture for even trying to speak with him any further. His hands were clenching in his lap, and at the moment he wasn't sure if it was for that gesture he wanted so badly to give her or for some means of self-mutilation. Only his father had ever made him feel so useless.

"Was it something at home?" She asked, and he nearly bit his tongue. "Was it your uncle?"

He closed his eyes, his conflict ending as soon as she brought his uncle up.

"I can understand if you want to protect him. He did save you from your father, but if he's doing something to harm you mentally or physically, you need to tell me, Riku."

Sephiroth had done nothing to harm him. Sephiroth was working to help him. No matter how many times his past turned up to haunt him, no many how many times he feared that Sephiroth would morph into his father, he was always Sephiroth, and not once had that man done anything to harm him. Okay, so he didn't know everything about Riku and could possibly beat him if he did find out, but that was needless to say when his father had beaten him for the fun of it.

That this woman kept accusing a man who was trying to pull him out of his past was enough to make him walk out.

He stood up and walked over to her desk. Ignoring her questions and confusion when he snatched a pad of paper and a pen off her desk, he flipped to a blank page. He scribbled hastily then threw it back down on her desk before he made a hasty retreat out of her office.

'_No offence, but you don't know anything, Ms. Rosewood.'_

KH

"Ohmigod! Larxene!_ Guess_ what I just heard!" Demyx demanded as he skidded into the young blonde's lap.

He had been missing in the first twenty minutes of the lunch hour, and though it made lunch rather quiet compared to what it had been, it made Larxene a surly woman to be reckoned with. In the lunch line she had nearly made a Senior girl cry when she had accidently brushed up against Larxene.

She looked unenthused by his outburst and sneered up at him. "Do I have to?"

He didn't seem to take notice. He jumped up and down in her lap with a huge smile eating his face. "Saix and Xigbar are about to have an all-out brawl in the courtyard in fifteen minutes. If we hurry we can make it before the crowd gets too wild and have front-row seats!"

Larxene's eyes started glittering dangerously and Demyx stood and pulled her to her feet, knowing what that smile meant. "Let's go, my deranged pet," she said suddenly happy, grabbing his arm and pulling him out of the lunch hall.

Kairi watched them go, her head tilted to the side curiously. "If there were ever two people so twisted and perfect for each other, it would be those two."

Her twin nodded poking at something on her tray that everyone thought was something edible but turned out to be bleached tar. "If Demyx weren't a total flamer and Larxene weren't a complete bitch I'd say they could be happily married." A stunned silence met Namine's calm assessment and she looked up worriedly. "What? Did I say something odd?"

"So, who's having the Halloween party this year?" Kairi asked while throwing her hair out of her face as she diverted the shocked crowd away from her sister.

Roxas looked around to Sora, his twin usually having the scoop on where parties were to be held and when. However, the brunette was looking at his turned-off cell phone as if it were the reason for all the injustice in the world, the biggest injustice today being the cardboard the lunch ladies had tried to pass off as turkey. Roxas looked at him worriedly. Whatever had been bothering Sora yesterday had clearly followed over to today.

Namine saved him. "I heard it was going to be at Tidus' house. Jack and Sally are celebrating their third anniversary so it can't be there. You know, maybe we could have a party at our house."

Kairi scoffed. "Oh, yeah. Dad totally wouldn't kill us over that. Who are you going to go with, Namie?"

"I'm not sure," she said, scooping up some sort of vegetable goo with her spoon and sniffing it. "I was thinking about asking Hayner."

"Hayner?" Kairi obviously didn't agree with that choice. "Why not Roxas?"

She smiled sagely. "Roxas has eyes for one and one alone and those eyes are not for me."

Roxas glared at her, wishing that if looks couldn't kill at the very least they could severely injure. No such luck. Kairi looked between them momentarily, her eyes filled with curiosity that was quickly shrugged off as she turned to Sora.

"You and me going again this year, Sora?" she asked. They didn't go as a couple. Kairi's crush on him had long since passed and Sora had never seemed to have more than an in-depth curiosity about her. But ever since their Freshman Year they had gone together as friends for their lack of lasting love-life.

"No…" he said quietly. "I don't think I'm going to go this year."

Kairi literally looked heartbroken. "But Sora! This will be our last Halloween party as high school-ers. You have to go!"

"I might have to work, Kai." He fingered the screen of his phone absently, as if not really paying attention to the world. Kairi looked ready to snatch it out of his hands and throw it.

"Oh, whatever!" she screeched. "You have that old Scrooge wrapped around your finger so tight you could take the year off and still get full pay! Why aren't you going?"

"Because I don't feel like it, Kairi!" he snapped at her, finally looking up from his phone to glare at her.

"What's wrong with you? I knew you and Riku had become close friends but I didn't expect you to spiral into depression the one day he's not here. Geez, Sora, it's not the end of the world!"

"My mood has nothing to do with Riku," Sora growled. "It has to do with the fact that you're harping on me to do something I just don't feel like doing anymore."

She slammed her hand down on the table. "But we've always gone to the Halloween party. Every year all of us dress up and go together. It's tradition."

"Yeah, well, we've always gone to school together too, but guess what! That's probably going to change too."

"Which is why we need to have as many memories as we can. It's our last Halloween party!"

They were gaining attention quickly as their voices escalated. Roxas and Namine glanced around, then worriedly returned their gaze to their respective twins. Kairi was known for a temper, but Sora was the main attraction; Roxas knew. Sora never had anything ill to say. Some would even go as far as to say that he was the livelihood of the school. No one had ever seen Sora like this. Roxas hadn't seen Sora like this since their parents had died three years ago.

This mood he was in was beginning to more than worry Roxas.

"You're being melodramatic, Kai." Sora continued to yell.

"I am not! You're being sour," she shot back. "Riku's not here and you're mad, sad, and emotionally unavailable. All you've done all day is stare at your stupid phone - which isn't even turned on - as if you're waiting for it to ring. You haven't talked to anyone and when you have you've just been distant. Now I'm sorry your little boyfriend is absent today but try not to act like a lovesick puppy."

Sora stood sharply and when he did Kairi stood to, not one to take anything sitting down. "He is_ not_ my boyfriend, Kairi, and I'm not acting like a lovesick puppy! You know, you're just mad because…"

"Axel kissed Roxas!"

The argument between the two brunettes was suddenly halted and all but forgotten as their heads whipped around on their necks to look at Namine. Roxas looked ready for murder as he stared at the blonde girl with wide, shocked eyes.

"What?" both Sora and Kairi shrieked simultaneously, their disbelief evident in their high-pitched voices.

Namine breathed a sigh of relief, glad that they were distracted from each other, before she felt the piercing stare of Roxas. "Oh no," she breathed as she too whipped around to meet his stare.

KH

Riku stormed out of the office with Dr. Rosewood following him. Sephiroth looked up sharply at the sound of the office door colliding with the wall, but kept his face carefully blank. Riku stopped in front of him, breathing heavily, and looking at him pleadingly. His face was flushed and his hands were clenching, not to mention his irregular breathing.

"Riku!" Dr. Rosewood yelled as she came after him, reaching out for him.

Sephiroth came up to his feet slowly, ominously, staring down at the small woman with a glare Riku had never seen at home. In that one moment, Riku saw the family resemblance between his uncle and his father, but the difference was startling even then. His father had used that glare on him often, hatred shining in his eyes every time. Sephiroth used it to protect him. Without looking away from the woman he took his keys out of his coat pocket and handed them Riku. "I'll meet you at the car."

Riku took them and quickly made his exit, shaking his hair out of his eyes to cast one last glare at the psychiatrist as he made his way to the elevator.

"Sephiroth." Her disdain was evident in her tone.

In a quiet voice that demanded nothing but fearful respect he asked, "Is there something with which I can assist you?"

She took her useless glasses off, and tried to meet his glare equally, but it was null and void. Sephiroth had had years of practice glaring at his brother, his classmates, his colleagues. This woman was sadly uneducated on how to be intimidating.

She still tried though as she said arrogantly, "What is the point of bringing Riku to me, if you are going to let him run away from what he needs to talk about."

"I think it is quite clear that he's not running away from his problems. It appeared to me as if he was fleeing…you," he said evenly.

Her lips disappeared instantaneously, and she puffed up as if ready for a fight. Sephiroth merely raised his eyebrow at her. His coworkers gave him more challenge than this woman. If she wanted to throw down the gauntlet, he would gladly pick it up.

She didn't continue as he expected though, something he was oddly disappointed in. She cleared her throat. "I'd like to talk to you about Riku. Now it says in his file that you couldn't enroll him into a school for special needs? Is that correct?"

He inhaled calmingly and took a step back. "It is. By the time custody was relinquished to me, the semester enrollment had ended and I was requested to enroll him for the next year."

"And this school he's in, you feel that it's appropriate. Could you not have kept him at home for the year?"

"We had discussed it briefly. He was very adamant about continuing his education as planned."

"Uh huh," she said snidely. "You didn't think this was a blocking mechanism?"

"I was actually quite thrilled that he was willing to interact with other children at all."

"Does he? Interact with others, I mean?"

"He does. He has a little friend named Sora. I met him briefly. I'm sure he has a few other friends as well, but he can't say much about them." He checked his watched ostentatiously, making sure she got the hint that he didn't want to be there anymore.

She did notice, and continued with a sneer. "How are his teachers? Do they understand his problems?"

"He isn't an invalid, Ms. Rosewood, and I would appreciate it if you didn't treat him as one," Sephiroth said defensively.

"It's a simple question," she huffed.

"I speak with his teachers often. They do as much as they can to help him. They have found ways to communicate with him, and have scheduled time after classes in case he is in need of assistance."

"What about you? Have you found ways of communicating with him?"

He had a feeling he knew where this was going. "I do as much as I can without feeling that I'm smothering him. He's a teenage boy, who needs a normal life and I'm a heart surgeon more often than not on call. If he needs me he knows to approach."

"He's also a boy whose father poured bleach down his throat. He needs comfort and reassurance. His own skin and blood betrayed him; nearly killed him! I don't think in a situation like this he's going to reach out to anyone, especially not the brother of that man."

His hackles rose. "I am not my brother, Ms. Rosewood, and he is very much aware of that."

"Thus the nightmares…" she shot back.

"Are you insinuating that I am the cause of my nephew's discomfort?" he asked in a low tone. He knew this is where she had been heading, but for the life of him, he was still upset by the accusation. He'd had a hard enough time jumping through all the legal hoops to even get custody of Riku. The lawyers, the psychiatrists, the child welfare associates…he would have had an easier time doing heart surgery blindfolded, and with both of his hands tied behind his back.

"I'm just saying that maybe it would be best if you tried reaching out to him a bit more than you are. He is in need of your guiding hand and trying to let someone who's so fresh out of trauma have their own life is not something I would recommend."

"It is the fact that his life is his own that I am trying to instill," Sephiroth insisted vehemently. "It belongs to no one other than himself, not to me, not to his father, and certainly not to you. I will make a larger effort to help him, but I will not tyrannize his life." He brushed invisible dust off of his coat as he calmed himself, and then gave her one last look, taking satisfaction in her flustered appearance. Gladly adding to it, he inclined his head to her and said, "Have a good day, dear lady."

He left her no time to say anything else but swept away towards the elevator to aid his distressed nephew.

KH

Sora walked into his house slowly, clicking the door shut quietly behind him. He had asked Scrooge for the night off, something he was only too happy to give Sora because that meant he didn't have to pay for vacation anytime soon. The brunette was glad for his day off too, feeling as if he didn't have the energy to do much of anything. The last two days had all but drained him.

Riku, Kairi, not to mention Roxas, who was now in the worst mood ever. His secret coming out in the manner that it had sent him into a rage the likes of which only Sora had ever been witness to. He had stomped around the rest of the day, snapping at people, slamming lockers, throwing his books and things around. He had ignored Namine's pleads to forgive her. He had ignored even more fervently Sora trying to talk to him about it. At the end of the day, he had stormed out of the school to go to work.

Sora prayed for anyone who tried to talk to him there. It wouldn't end well. He had half the mind to call Axel, to see if perhaps he could get answers out of him or if he could calm Roxas down. That wouldn't end well though. If he called Axel and the redhead approached his twin, Roxas would kill him and then maim Sora.

He shook his thoughts free as he walked into the kitchen, intent on getting a glass of water and then afterwards holing himself up in his room for the rest of the night. He was shocked when he saw Leon there. Usually his brother wasn't home until nine or later, having become a workaholic since their parents' death. The fact that he had been home yesterday was odd. That he was home today this early must be a sign of the apocalypse.

He kept that thought to himself though, as he went to the cabinet to grab a water glass. He didn't want to further annoy his brother, who kept his hostility for weeks at a time. He was probably still mad at Sora for what happened yesterday. He was probably pissed at Aerith, who had stopped his from calling Sora back after he had walked away. Leon didn't like being ignored.

He downed his water quickly, trying to get out of the kitchen quickly. He set his glass next to the sink and made for the exit, only sparing his brother a glance.

Leon was working on his portion of the bills, which meant his face was pinched. He scribbled checks to the companies he was paying and glancing at the mess he had created around him. The bills were probably too expensive. They usually were, though Aerith and he never mentioned these things. That was the reason why Leon worked from sunup to so late in the night. Regular hours between he and Aerith would keep them scraping by, but Leon liked to have breathing room.

Leon liked them to live in as close to the same conditions as they had before mom and dad died.

"Hey, Leon?" Sora said quietly, having stopped just short of the door to face his brother's back.

"What?" he growled, his concentration shot and his irritation spiked.

Sora felt bad that he could get Leon's dander up so quickly, even though everyone could do that. It wasn't really just him. Roxas had that ability. Aerith had the ability. People who hadn't even met Leon had that ability. Yet sometimes it felt as if Sora pushed his buttons perfectly. Sometimes Sora felt that if it weren't for him, Leon may be able to breathe a little easier, and not just in the sense of finances. Leon would probably growl at him about how that was a ridiculous thought, and that they were brothers, blah, blah, blah.

It didn't change the way the younger one felt though. Leon worked so hard for them, and Sora had his phone taken away, relied on his twin to tell the older siblings where he was, and yelled at Leon, just because he was confused about Riku. That was a good brother, oh yeah, he thought sarcastically.

And Leon still called to get his phone for him.

Sora swallowed shamefully. "Thanks for getting my phone back."

Leon didn't look up from his work. He continued to scribble on checks, completely oblivious to Sora's plight, and unaware as he normally was that his actions were hurting those around him. Sora turned to leave, shaking his head at his own naiveté. Then, Leon said with a sigh, "Its fine, Sora."

It really wasn't, but the fact that Leon would say it meant it wasn't as bad as Sora thought it was. That was a comforting thought as he went upstairs to his room, pulling his phone out to stare at the blank screen. No one would be texting tonight. Well, maybe Namine to see how Roxas was doing, which wasn't well. But Roxas wouldn't be texting when he had nothing to do at work. Kairi would be ignoring him for the next two days and Riku…

He still wished he hadn't touched him.

KH

They had only just returned home when Sephiroth led Riku to the living room to have a seat on the couch, taking his own in his recliner. They were silent for several minutes, which was worse than torture. Riku knew a 'conversation' was coming, and he hated waiting for his uncle to speak. He was used to the silences when they were reading a book in the same vicinity, but this was so different. He could practically see Sephiroth forming the right words in his head.

Finally Sephiroth gathered his thoughts and plowed into his interrogation. "Did you even try to explain your nightmare to her?"

He shook his head, keeping his gaze with the older man. It would not do if he looked at the couch he was seated on. Sephiroth was a man of eye to eye communication.

'That's better than your father's fist to face communication,' Mickey said and it took all of Riku's might not to shake his head. His uncle probably didn't know that he had a voice in his head that talked to him, and it was better to keep it that way.

"She is trying to help you, Riku," Sephiroth scolded. "It would behoove you to actually communicate with her, to express yourself without worrying about hurting anyone's feelings."

He shook his head again. He wasn't normally one to be stubborn, but he didn't want to talk to her anymore. If he had to he would throw a silent fit, hoping that it didn't lead Sephiroth to murder. He would be resolute until it was obvious that wouldn't see that woman again. He didn't like knowing others thought him to be as worthless as his father had. He didn't like people making him feel more useless than he already felt. He didn't like her blaming the only person Riku could rely on for his mental instability.

'I hope you're not referring to me,' Mickey sneered.

He wasn't, but he would make a note not to forget about his deranged voice in the future.

He was startled back to reality when Sephiroth asked sharply, "Then what is the reason behind a psychiatrist?"

Riku merely shrugged.

Sephiroth rubbed his eyes, momentarily. In that second, he looked as tired as Riku felt, and Riku felt bad for him, thinking that perhaps if his father had succeeded in his mission to kill him, his uncle wouldn't have to deal with the headache Riku knew he was. "I don't know how to help you, Riku," he said, returning his eyes to him. "You need to speak to someone who has the qualifications to assist you."

Riku stared at him for a second before searching around for a pen and paper. His uncle's house was a very neat place, so it wasn't lying around freely. Paper was only found in the office, in Riku's room, and in Riku's bag. He held up his hands to make a T for timeout and raced to his room, walking quickly but not running, to grab a paper and writing utensil, stopping at his desk to write a quick sentence.

He came back just as quickly and handed the paper to Sephiroth.

'_I don't like her. She doesn't understand.'_

Sephiroth raised his brows in comprehension, nodding as it all fell into place for him. He set the paper down on the coffee table in front of the couch, and told Riku firmly, "I will endeavor to find someone better suited to your needs. But next time, if the occasion calls, inform me sooner."

Riku nodded.

The older took a deep breath and hoisted himself out of his recliner. Riku took a step back, not far enough away to show fear, just far enough away to give the tall man room to move about. Sephiroth came up to him slowly, which Riku was learning didn't mean anything bad. Then he raised his hand and rested it one Riku's shoulder.

The need to run was definitely there, as it was he couldn't stop the flinch. This was the first time that Sephiroth had ever really made physical contact with him aside from the days he had come to the hospital and held Riku's hand as he recovered. But once the hand was on his shoulder, even though he was so tense he was about to snap in half, the touch felt fatherly. Instead of just knowing that he was safe, he felt it. For the first time in forever, he felt protected. He felt that Sephiroth would not only fight to keep him out of harm's way, but that he would kill for it.

'It's a nice feeling, isn't it?' Mickey asked without his usual insensitivity.

It was. Riku looked up into his uncle's sea-green eyes, so different from the angry amber of his father's, and he did what he hadn't been able to do since he was five. He relaxed. His shoulder and back muscles loosened up and it almost seemed like he was slouching as the tension left him sagging.

"Would you like Japanese cuisine for tonight's supper?" Sephiroth asked kindly.

Riku nodded, tossing his hair out of his eyes.

KH

Roxas locked the doors to the tiny restaurant Tifa Lockhart owned as he exited. The day still replayed in his head even so late at night when the day had long since passed. He still couldn't believe that Namine had shouted that for the entire world to hear. Seriously, he loved Kairi and Sora both dearly, but Namine could've yelled bubblegum and their fight would have been canceled. She had no right to go off spouting infuriating details about Axel's shining moment of stupidity. There had been a reason he didn't tell anyone other than her.

He turned around to begin his walk home, but was brought up short by Axel, himself, leaning against the building.

He glowered momentarily before he commanded Axel. "Go away."

The redhead visibly slumped against the wall, his face twisting in confusion. "Dude, I haven't spoken to you in twenty-four hours. How the hell did I do something to piss you off if I haven't seen you since we last spoke?"

"You have a special talent," Roxas sneered, trying to make his way passed the redhead. Axel kept moving in front of him. The blonde growled irritably. "Go. Away."

He made another attempt to move passed the freakishly tall man, but was stilled by a hand on his shoulder. Axel looked at him with pleading green eyes. "Will you at least tell me what I did wrong so I can beat myself up for the next three weeks, while you ignore me?"

"You didn't do anything," he snapped with a glare, not at all effected by the green eyes that stared at him painfully. "I just don't want to see you. What is so hard to understand about that?"

The large, spindly hand fell away from his arm and the redhead crossed his arms over his chest. His eyes went blank, a defense-mechanism that Roxas thought helped to keep his emotions from getting to him, making it easier for him to be an ass. "Roxas, tell me what the hell is wrong with you!" he demanded.

"Namine told everyone that you kissed me," Roxas said quietly, afraid that anyone would hear him. He finally brushed passed Axel and began his walk towards home.

"What's wrong with that?" he asked stupidly.

"I didn't want anyone to know. I, myself, was trying to forget it." It was the truth and a lie. He did want to forget the kiss, but the fact that it had been the best damn kiss he had ever received made him a little hesitant to actually do so. That and Axel wasn't too bad on the eyes, and, yeah, he was funny. Hell, given the right circumstances the ass could even be considerate. But he wasn't focusing on that. He was focusing on the fact that he really did want nothing to do with Axel in more than a platonic way. Really…

"Am I really that repulsive?" Axel asked, taking two large steps to catch up with Roxas.

Roxas rolled his eyes. "Don't make this about you."

"I am a Class A egomaniac," he said with a hint of pride in his voice. "I am obsessed with myself, therefore everything_ is_ about me."

"Fine, if you must know, yes," Roxas said with false resolution. "I really do find you that repulsive. Now leave before I_ strangle you_!"

"Have you ever thought about going back to anger management?" Axel asked, completely disregarding the fact that Roxas had just insulted him. He was one to do that. What he didn't want to hear, he filtered out and ignored.

Roxas took a deep breath and turned around to face the infuriating man before him. Slowly and carefully he said, "I'm going to go home now. I was going to talk to you tomorrow, but if I don't, don't be surprised. Leave me alone, or I will beat your face in." He whirled around then, walking away quickly. He was genuinely surprised when he didn't hear Axel following him, but didn't dare turn around to look at him.

Axel stood still in his spot, watching the blond walk away from him in a hostile manner he was only too acquainted with. Feeling the need to either infuriate him or…you know, let the blond know he cared he called after the retreating form, "Good night, Roxas."

He got the bird for his efforts.

**A/N: There are no excuses. It just was. Please forgive me for whatever you feel like blaming me for, even if you want to blame me for your empty soda can or dirty room.**

**And because I think it's fun to include my readers and I really have no set preference in pairings, who would you rather see Aerith with? Sephiroth or Cloud?**

**Please review. I know I'm a terrible author and I don't deserve as much, but…bitte?**

**InnocentGuilt**


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